tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26385770342004597812024-03-13T16:13:23.822+00:00Diary of a Ballet MumBallet Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16672759204896657445noreply@blogger.comBlogger54125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-60677930939434408402021-03-22T08:40:00.000+00:002021-03-22T08:40:02.712+00:00A journal entry from 2020: The COVID-19 Year<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5dq5fPj2BuA/YFhXOa3o6UI/AAAAAAAAB4c/DTLl_bJVqKs8EiacbuLuzvJbkURfAb5ygCLcBGAsYHQ/s2048/journal%2Bimage.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1672" data-original-width="2048" height="163" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5dq5fPj2BuA/YFhXOa3o6UI/AAAAAAAAB4c/DTLl_bJVqKs8EiacbuLuzvJbkURfAb5ygCLcBGAsYHQ/w200-h163/journal%2Bimage.JPG" width="200" /></a></div><br />One year ago I started a new journal. <p></p><p>The first entry, dated 22 March 2020 was headed <i>2020. The COVID-19 Year</i>. I find it interesting looking back. This is what I wrote that day last lear:</p><p>"We are in the midst of a global pandemic.</p><p>Yesterday, Jacinda Ardern announced an alert system for New Zealand. We are at alert level two. This means the risk of community transmission is growing. Borders are closed, domestic travel discouraged, working from home encouraged, and over 70s and people with compromised immunity (and other health conditions) advised to stay at home.</p><p>Italy went into lockdown some time ago, eventually the UK followed suit and the schools there closed on Friday. The death rate in Italy has grown steadily (actually perhaps exponentially) since the outbreak hit in Feb. The pattern in the UK looks remarkably similar only delayed by two weeks. It's a huge concern.</p><p>In NZ we have the benefit of seeing what has unfolded elsewhere and as the fabulous Jacinda Ardern has said it means we have gone in hard and gone in early. Underpinned by testing and isolating (areas the other governments haven't always got right) so far the approach seems to be well thought through, coherent, consistent, compassionate. Ashley Bloomfield has also been great. The coordination and the comms have been impressive as far as I am concerned. It won't be plain sailing.</p><p>Yesterday, NZ stood at 52 cases, no deaths - I think 3 or 4 hospitalised. All but two cases associated with overseas travel and it is these two, where contacts are still being traced, which have raised the alarm about possible community transmission.</p><p>It can be difficult not to feel gloomy but I've had lots of message contact with UK folks. Susannah and I went shopping in the rather quiet Queensgate centre for more trousers for her (pre "Alert level 2" announcement). Then Bruce and I bought heaters for each of the girls' rooms. I have this urge to prepare for this winter. Instead of a meal out we got a rather fine take away from Bikaner." </p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-87391161981022519482020-11-17T05:19:00.003+00:002020-11-17T05:50:04.481+00:00Ten years on<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SgBr_XUpSWk/X7NdNi8y6lI/AAAAAAAAByI/g7_m8OA2OkcMrXDbI5FojF9FP8qR3t_YACLcBGAsYHQ/s937/86498757_10158140620592372_7848363077656379392_n%25281%2529.jpg" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="937" data-original-width="937" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SgBr_XUpSWk/X7NdNi8y6lI/AAAAAAAAByI/g7_m8OA2OkcMrXDbI5FojF9FP8qR3t_YACLcBGAsYHQ/w200-h200/86498757_10158140620592372_7848363077656379392_n%25281%2529.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo credit: Pippa C<br /></td></tr></tbody></table>By the time you reach 50 you will have a story to tell - probably several - and most days will be an anniversary of something. Births, marriages, deaths. Tragedies and triumphs.<p></p><p>Today, is one of the more significant anniversaries for me: ten years on since life-saving bowel cancer surgery. </p><p>I am here to tell the tale - yay! But this story is not one with a clear beginning, middle and end. The diagnosis was one starting point, but before that symptoms, and before that DNA unseen, mutating so that cells grew out of control becoming a tumour. The surgery was the middle of the year of treatment - preceded by radiotherapy, followed by chemotherapy - but could hardly be the middle of the journey. The cancer may be long gone, but I am left with a permanent colostomy and early osteoporosis in the spine. So I guess what I am saying is the story is continuing. </p><p>Ten years ago, I was lucky to have many wonderful friends and family to help me through that most challenging chapter. Once again I say thank you to everyone who supported me at that time - whether it was with a few words of kindness, or substantial practical help. It was challenging, yes, but also not nearly as tough as it could have been. </p><p>Five years ago I had a fantastic party. There was dancing (and food, drink, decorations, kids activities). </p><p>This ten year anniversary will be lower key. Everyone has had a tough year and as a family we are no exception. However, I am looking forward to a fabulous weekend away with a couple of friends doing the Queenstown 10km this weekend. Perhaps some time soon I will sort out a belated celebration with music and dancing, but sadly almost everyone who was alongside me ten or five years ago will only be able to join in spirit. </p><p>Looking back I mostly feel lucky. I coped well at the time, and wasn't prone to self pity. I was supported and loved. There were highs as well as lows. The experience shaped me, it didn't break me.</p><p>I haven't blogged for a couple of years. Life gets busy and then you wonder if you really have anything to say that is worth sharing with others. And this bit of my life is not exactly news to those most likely to read this!</p><p>But, I do want to connect. We all have our unique stories and I look forward to hearing more of yours soon. Today, mine is about cancer. Tomorrow it could be about something completely different. </p><p>xxx</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-5580290592423101602018-08-18T06:02:00.000+01:002018-08-18T06:05:15.580+01:00More on #50before50 This is probably a post for people who like lists!<br />
<br />
Thank you to everyone who has made a suggestion for things I should do before I'm 50 - including books to read, music to listen to and films to watch. You are already enriching my life just by thinking about these things.<br />
<br />
I'll give a wee progress report at the end of this blog post, but for now, here are items 11-25 on my list of 50 - the first ten items were announced previously in <a href="http://balletmum.blogspot.com/2018/08/introducing-50before50.html" target="_blank">introducing #50before50</a>.<br />
<br />
<b>11. A 50km cycle</b><br />
This was suggested by a friend who has recently, very impressively, completed Land's End to John O'Groats. She suggests doing a 50km ride on my own in the countryside. This makes me nervous so I think I will commit to the distance and see how it goes! I will endeavour to cycle somewhere beautiful though, and to try and make at least some of the journey in countryside.<br />
<br />
<b>12. Blog about Quaker values/testimonies</b><br />
<div>
- probably a post per theme: peace, truth, simplicity, equality, sustainability.<br />
<br />
<b>13. Go for a day and night away with Bruce somewhere of his choosing</b> </div>
<div>
Again, this item was suggested by a friend. I wonder where he will suggest?!<br />
<br />
<b>14. Go on a sea kayaking adventure</b><br />
<br />
<b>15. Knitting for a cause.</b> </div>
<div>
This is adopted from a suggestion a Wellington friend made after reading my last blog post. She suggested learning an old style craft such as knitting, quilting or macrame. It put me in mind of knitting that Lewes friends were doing: knitting squares to be crocheted together to make blankets to welcome refugees. I'm going to do something along those lines I reckon.<br />
<br />
<b>16. Learn some Te Reo <span style="font-family: inherit;">M</span></b><b><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: inherit;">āori</span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Cambria; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span lang="EN-AU"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div>
Learning 'some' is very non-specific. I guess I will find a beginners course and complete a certain number of lessons.<br />
<br />
<b>17. Learn to play a piano piece.</b><br />
<br />
<b>18. Letters for Amnesty International.</b></div>
<div>
Do you think I could manage 50?<br />
<br />
<b>19. Refresh my wardrobe from charity shops or second hand stores.</b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
<b>20. Run 10km</b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
<b>21. Scuba dive</b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
<b>22. Ski</b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
<b>23. Stick to a vegan diet for a week</b><br />
<br />
<b>24. Visit a country I've not visited before</b></div>
<div>
I fancy a Pacific Island - Fiji perhaps?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<b>25. Go somewhere fabulous for afternoon tea.</b><br />
(Not the same week as the vegan week!)</div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
My lists, and lists within lists are not yet full. Please do recommend books, films, music and activities I really should try to fit into my next 18 months.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
A quick progress report: I am closer to the splits (item 4 on the list), I have read another book, I have written my first hand-written letter to a friend (item 1 on the list) and as a family we watched one of the films: The Princess Bride - recommended by a Welsh friend. I love the fact that this project has given me an excuse to be in touch with friends around the world. Thank you for your interest. x</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6D24NhgIzEg/W3em4u5PSSI/AAAAAAAAA3A/ICDQiDjHzuMrT5CI-A5Tg36DNysOkBI7QCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_4206.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6D24NhgIzEg/W3em4u5PSSI/AAAAAAAAA3A/ICDQiDjHzuMrT5CI-A5Tg36DNysOkBI7QCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_4206.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xTu-o4jHWZ8/W3em4p6teLI/AAAAAAAAA3E/DYHC6Q4TweAph9xAigqojLjPwjHutrBKwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_4207.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xTu-o4jHWZ8/W3em4p6teLI/AAAAAAAAA3E/DYHC6Q4TweAph9xAigqojLjPwjHutrBKwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_4207.JPG" width="240" /></a>Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-60745113799554975972018-08-04T02:41:00.001+01:002018-08-04T02:52:39.126+01:00Introducing #50before50<br />
I've been planning a project to try and live well in the next couple of years: 50 before 50.<br />
<br />
There are times over the past few months that I felt as though I've been drifting. Marking time, not thriving. Not surprising I guess after such a major move a couple of years ago and putting so much into helping the kids make the most of their extra curricular activities. But I definitely need to reintroduce some focus, and to connect with things, people and activities that will help me to carry on growing, learning, and experiencing joy.<br />
<br />
In reality I won't manage everything on the list but it will be fun to try - a mixture of things that are important to me, health, creativity, adventure, and friendship.<br />
<br />
I have many ideas, and having started to mention it to some friends, I have ended up with a few new suggestions to add in.<br />
<br />
Three keys items on this bucket list of sorts are to read 50 books, listen to 50 albums/pieces of music, and watch 50 films recommended by friends. It was putting these on the list that made me realise I need to start now and not wait until my final year before turning 50!<br />
So, here are the first ten items on my 50 before 50 list:<br />
<br />
1. Write a letter on paper to 10 people that I've not seen for over a year.*<br />
2. Dance on a beach at dawn.*<br />
<div>
3. Do the City to Sea walk in Wellington.</div>
<div>
4. Get into the splits! (I'm already working on my flexibility!)</div>
<div>
5. Do a group hug with as many family members as I can at one time.*<br />
6. Join a peace vigil or protest march.<br />
7. Go whale watching.<br />
8. Read 50 books which have been recommended by friends.<br />
9. Listen to 50 albums or pieces of music recommended by friends.<br />
10. Watch 50 films recommended by friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
* Thank you, Elspeth, for numbers 1, 2, and 5 on this list.<br />
<br />
I've already been so grateful for the suggestions of friends I have talked to and messaged about this so far. The very act of starting to compile the list (and the individual lists of books, films and music) has made me smile. <br />
<br />
Having personal recommendations has the added benefit of me thinking of that person in connection with whatever it is too. The book, film, and music selections are wonderfully eclectic but I will save sharing these for another time.<br />
<br />
For now, I can just confirm that I have already read my first book (this one recommended by Pippa), and listened to my first piece of music. Both fabulous, making a wonderful start to this project - thank you.<br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , , sans-serif;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GqAi29RG5Jw/W2UBIKeQILI/AAAAAAAAA2Q/w9Gg7ZGoVdYXyLWeWFM8kGvg7lSOeFVoQCLcBGAs/s1600/FullSizeRender-3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GqAi29RG5Jw/W2UBIKeQILI/AAAAAAAAA2Q/w9Gg7ZGoVdYXyLWeWFM8kGvg7lSOeFVoQCLcBGAs/s320/FullSizeRender-3.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , , sans-serif;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , , sans-serif;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , , sans-serif;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "lucida grande"; font-size: 12px;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "lucida grande"; font-size: 12px;"><br /></span>
<iframe allow="autoplay; encrypted-media" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/CaPeks0H3_s" width="560"></iframe></div>
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-86929352096288333292018-05-31T05:56:00.000+01:002018-05-31T05:56:09.767+01:00Exercise and cancerThis medical headline caught my eye the other day:<br />
<br />
"Prescribe exercise to all cancer patients"<br />
<br />
It was in an emailed news alert. I didn't feel it was anything new - everyone knows exercise is good for you, right? Not just for cancer patients. Apparently this does mark a shift in thinking though. It is not so long ago that the emphasis was on advising patients to rest.<br />
<br />
Anyway, I followed the link which turned out to be from Australia: a position statement from the Clinical Oncology Society, but it could easily have been written for the UK or NZ health care system.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.mja.com.au/journal/2018/209/6/clinical-oncology-society-australia-position-statement-exercise-cancer-care">https://www.mja.com.au/journal/2018/209/6/clinical-oncology-society-australia-position-statement-exercise-cancer-care</a><br />
<br />
What surprised me most was quite how much exercise was being recommended:<br />
<br />
<div class="P" style="background-color: #e1e7ee; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: proxima-nova, nimbus-sans, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Roboto, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 1.6; margin-bottom: 1rem; padding: 0px; text-rendering: optimizeLegibility;">
COSA encourages all health professionals involved in the care of people with cancer to:</div>
<ul style="background-color: #e1e7ee; box-sizing: inherit; caret-color: rgb(10, 10, 10); color: #0a0a0a; font-family: proxima-nova, nimbus-sans, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Roboto, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 1.6; list-style-position: outside; margin: 0px 0px 1rem 1.25rem; padding: 0px;">
<li class="P" style="box-sizing: inherit; font-size: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">discuss the role of exercise in cancer recovery;</li>
<li class="P" style="box-sizing: inherit; font-size: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">recommend their patients adhere to exercise guidelines (avoid inactivity and progress towards at least 150 minutes of moderate intensity aerobic exercise and two to three moderate intensity resistance exercise sessions each week); and</li>
<li class="P" style="box-sizing: inherit; font-size: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">refer their patients to a health professional who specialises in the prescription and delivery of exercise (ie, accredited exercise physiologist or physiotherapist with experience in cancer care).</li>
</ul>
<br />
I assume there will be far more detail for health professionals who are implementing the recommendations, but I do hope they will be pragmatic and sensible. By the way, this has turned into a long blog post so feel free to jump to the end for a summary!<br />
<br />
I offer up some personal reflections on my own experience of exercise and cancer. You never know, it may strike a chord with someone.<br />
<br />
[Quick recap for anyone who doesn't know - I was diagnosed with Stage 3 bowel cancer - a rectal tumour - eight years ago, and went through about a year of treatment: chemoradiotherapy, surgery and chemo. All OK now thankfully.]<br />
<br />
<b>Before treatment</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
With two young children - one of whom was under 2 at the time of diagnosis - I did not have much of an exercise routine, but I was going to ballet once a week and was generally active in terms of taking kids to the playground - that kind of thing. I'd need to look back at my blog to know if I was doing much more than this, but I think I was still in the "I need to get back to more regular exercise" phase of early motherhood. No way would I say I was achieving 150 minutes of moderate intensity aerobic exercise with resistance sessions on top. Assuming carrying a toddler on a hip doesn't count as resistance exercise...<br />
<br />
At the point of first diagnosis would have been an <i>excellent</i> time to talk about building up the amount of exercise I was doing.<br />
<br />
When I found out it may be cancer, I was more determined than ever to get to my weekly ballet class. I also made more of an effort to take a short walk at lunch time on work days. This was an instinctive response to knowing I needing these things to manage the stress of having had a shock diagnosis while waiting for scans and to find out what I had to do to get rid of the tumour.<br />
<br />
But if the nurse had said if I could try to build up my exercise level a bit more - perhaps with an extra brisk walk or two for half an hour, or swimming, cycling, a gym session or even a boxercise class - I would have done it. It was nearly two months between my first diagnostic test and the start of treatment so I could have packed a bit more in I suspect.<br />
<br />
<b>Radiotherapy</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
My radiotherapy - technically chemoradiotherapy because it was accompanied with a low dose of oral chemo - was a five and a half week regime of Monday-Friday appointments.<br />
<br />
Some forms of exercise are discouraged rather than encouraged at this time. Swimming becomes no go - your skin is already being dried out and you don't want to make it worse. E45 becomes your friend. I seem to remember ignoring the swimming advice and going with the kids on the first weekend of treatment, but by week five the skin was so badly damaged in the most delicate of areas there was no way I could have contemplated a dip in the pool. Cycling would have been out by then too.<br />
<br />
But here's another factor: time pressure. I was trying to maintain a part-time job. Fortunately, I had a very understanding employer and could work flexible hours including work from home. I was driving myself to my appointments. With a half hour journey each way, ten minutes to find a parking space, quarter of an hour for treatment, up to three quarters of an hour waiting for delays in the radiotherapy suite... well, you get the picture. You've lost your whole morning.<br />
<br />
Plus, trying to keep things "normal" for the kids so prioritising doing things for them.<br />
<br />
For me, most of this was during the summer holiday so no ballet.<br />
<br />
Exercise week one? Probably managed a bit of walking, active play with the kids and the aforementioned swim. Exercise week five? With accumulated tiredness as a result of the treatment? More or less non-existent. Perhaps a gentle stroll or two at the weekend. I guess the weekends were where more could have been fitted in if I'd been in the brave new world of exercise physiologists.<br />
<br />
<b>Surgery</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
In the gap (8 weeks?) between radiotherapy and surgery, skin heals, energy returns and yes, a good time to be building up the exercise again. I was back to ballet. Notwithstanding the aforementioned time pressure, I guess a more intensive regime would have been feasible.<br />
<br />
Then. Bam! Seven hours in surgery, rearrangement of the innards, doses of morphine to try and keep the pain at bay. For the first couple of days, I could hardly get out of bed - with a drop in blood pressure stopping me every time I tried. All the same, through determination (bloody mindedness) and help from some - sadly not all - of the health team I was out of hospital in record time. Well, not a record as such. but it was just under a week.<br />
<br />
However, it was at this time that I did actually have some exercise advice. It was about managing life after a colostomy. Having had the surgery - heavy lifting was not recommended for 6 weeks, but then I was encouraged to try and not let my stoma get in the way of having an active lifestyle.<br />
<br />
This was a period of healing and recovery, a steady return to physical fitness such as it was by then (and maybe one or two ballet classes?!). Ready for the next onslaught:<br />
<br />
<b>Chemotherapy</b><br />
<br />
I was on a three week cycle of IV and oral chemo. These included days where all efforts went into keeping food down. Of course with chemo, your immune system takes a hefty knock and you need to be careful about mixing in crowds which could limit your options when you do actually start to feel human enough to leave the house.<br />
<br />
It wasn't all bad though. In the three week cycle, there is one week free of drugs and feeling much better. I was managing to dance more weeks than not. There was generally getting out and about. Not much of high intensity, but a general sense that fitness could build up again.<br />
<br />
Oh yes, one more limiting factor - a PICC line fitted to allow the chemo to be delivered straight into the blood stream. Not suitable for swimming with. It didn't stop me dancing but made my arm feel a bit more tired.<br />
<br />
After three rounds of chemo, the IV drug I was on was cancelled. My body just wasn't tolerating it sufficiently - with platelets and white blood counts dropping to worrying levels. So that was that, four more rounds of tablets only. The side effects of these were minimal so I was back on track. It would have been another good time to discuss exercise...<br />
<br />
<b>After treatment</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I'd survived! Hurrah! And with that, I was ready to live life to the full. I started a year of fundraising for Macmillan Cancer Support which included activity as well as the ubiquitous coffee mornings. I was very happy to be able to do things, so I did them. A family sponsored walk? I'm in. Swimming with the kids? Don't mind if I do. Cycling? Get me some padded cycling shorts and we'll see what can be done! (I kid you not, cycling shorts were on my Christmas list that year and made all the difference to getting back on the saddle).<br />
<br />
I was lucky. For some, the period after treatment is no less hard than what has gone before. You have become used to people looking out for your well being at every stage. I know many people feel low finishing treatment when they are expected to face the world without frequent contact with caring professionals, while they are still coming to terms with the long term effects of their experience - whether that is physical changes or the emotional fall out.<br />
<br />
This is probably a phase where many would benefit from an ongoing supervised exercise programme. Good for the mind and body.<br />
<br />
<b>In summary...</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>For the 52 weeks following diagnosis, any exercise beyond walking would have been nearly impossible for around six of those weeks. And for another six it would have been tough to have managed more than moderate exercise.</li>
<li>It is easier to do an exercise you love (dancing), but your treatment may limit your options - if you are a swimmer, or weight lifter for example.</li>
<li>I would have responded well to discussions about exercise before treatment started and at the end. Not sure about in between times.</li>
<li>Life is busy. Exercise is important, but so too is holding down a job and reading bedtime stories to your children. </li>
</ul>
I would also add, that you can probably do more than you think, but in no way should you beat yourself up for not doing the recommended amount.<br />
<br />
On the other hand, there is inspiration to be had out there. I found this article:<br />
<br />
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=12047228<br />
<br />
How this young mother managed to hit the treadmill after her chemo is beyond me. But perhaps that is partly the point. The chemo doesn't actually affect you as badly if you add a cardiovascular work out into the mix?<br />
<br />
If exercise really is the wonder drug, then services could usefully build gyms and gardens next to their oncology suites. Exercise sessions could be timed around appointments. It will be interesting to see if new ways of working evolve as the evidence mounts.<br />
<br />
I am not an expert. I just offer this reflection as one illustration that cancer treatment has ups and downs. What works for one person may not for another. If anyone is going through this right now, you have my sympathy. I wish you strength.<br />
<br />
Take care x<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X8zA8M1UN-Q/Ww9kVPWAL7I/AAAAAAAAA0c/SLewGH76QMc_DreUW2I6DruFmQcbpfUCQCLcBGAs/s1600/DSCN0171.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X8zA8M1UN-Q/Ww9kVPWAL7I/AAAAAAAAA0c/SLewGH76QMc_DreUW2I6DruFmQcbpfUCQCLcBGAs/s320/DSCN0171.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A bit of family exercise <i>after</i> treatment: fundraising walk for Macmillan Cancer Support, 2011</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-34572748967256130912018-02-10T22:55:00.000+00:002018-02-11T02:21:12.758+00:00Butterflies DancedFlicking through a notebook I found a poem I wrote on the spur of a moment a few months ago. I don't often write poetry, and actually don't often read it. However, having experienced an uplifting walk and appreciating the butterflies at the top of the hill, it was my attempt to capture a little of that.<br />
<br />
<b>Butterflies Danced</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Taut heart<br />
Lonely morning<br />
Melancholy creeping<br />
Unarticulated longing<br />
Time out needed.<br />
<br />
And then...<br />
<br />
Up the hill on a sunny day<br />
Trees working their magic<br />
Body reacting, breath rushing, blood pumping<br />
Heart rate rising<br />
Heavy heart lightening<br />
<br />
Reaching the top<br />
A peak with a view<br />
Sky so, so blue.<br />
<br />
I missed you.<br />
<br />
But the butterflies danced.<br />
Fluttering, chasing, captivating.<br />
The moment would have happened<br />
Whether or not I was there.<br />
But I was there<br />
You were not, but a piece of you was with me.<br />
<br />
The butterflies danced.<br />
Unwittingly soothing a soul.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-05pvSVR974E/Wn91RL6l-xI/AAAAAAAAAt4/6dx0fJSTuV8JvFDxmYylIyhqBq7gI1skwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_3203.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-05pvSVR974E/Wn91RL6l-xI/AAAAAAAAAt4/6dx0fJSTuV8JvFDxmYylIyhqBq7gI1skwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_3203.JPG" width="240" /></a><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gsVtGopk8Y8/Wn90WRkpb5I/AAAAAAAAAts/9erIqMPcEI0HpYOXN9vedBzHbAECM0JPgCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_2806.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gsVtGopk8Y8/Wn90WRkpb5I/AAAAAAAAAts/9erIqMPcEI0HpYOXN9vedBzHbAECM0JPgCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_2806.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I don't think I took any photos on that particular walk - but the hill was Johnston Hill. The butterflies were probably not white admirals as pictured, but this photo was taken in our garden recently and also raised a smile.Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-85173935239110155032017-12-01T09:41:00.000+00:002017-12-01T09:41:19.463+00:00Happiness advent calendarOK. Normally a blog post takes me a while to craft. Today I'm going to try being super quick because I just wanted to this advent calendar from Action for Happiness and see if anyone fancies joining in wth me.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lmEDmKyCbTs/WiEe8c7wXfI/AAAAAAAAApQ/CmMWm2DSk7QUJTxkN3N8DmXKaTqH1_g_wCLcBGAs/s1600/kindness_calendar.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1132" data-original-width="1600" height="451" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lmEDmKyCbTs/WiEe8c7wXfI/AAAAAAAAApQ/CmMWm2DSk7QUJTxkN3N8DmXKaTqH1_g_wCLcBGAs/s640/kindness_calendar.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I don't suppose for a minute that I will follow the suggestion for every day, but even if I do a third of it, and a couple of others join in, we'll have done something good this festive season.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
It is hard to feel Christmassy in the gorgeous Wellington sunshine we are having at the moment - in the region of 27C top temperature today. Whereas I have friends in various parts of the UK who are braving the snow. But I don't think it really matters if you feel Christmassy or not, this calendar is probably worth a go any month of the year, whatever the season - and unusually for a advent calendar it goes past the 25th.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I've already done day one, by sharing this with you. Let's see how we go for the days coming up. Already I can see tomorrow will be a challenge as there will be next to no time to make gifts! Sunday may be easier - leaving a happy note. I'm interested to see what form the 18th will take: 'try out the art of positive gossiping!'</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
So how about it? </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
For more info on Action for Happiness see: http://www.actionforhappiness.org </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Or follow on social media.</div>
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-20480884900728019452017-11-17T10:04:00.001+00:002017-11-17T10:04:30.094+00:00Seven years on, reflections on bowel cancerIt's that time of year again. This time seven years ago I was under the knife for life-saving surgery to remove a cancerous tumour. It's an anniversary of sorts, although I don't think you'll find a celebratory card in Clintons (not sure if you even have Clintons in NZ - think Whitcoulls or something!).<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Over the past few months, I've been working on the bowel screening programme for Hutt Valley District Health Board. Screening is a new thing in New Zealand and a large part of my role is encouraging eligible people to participate in the programme. I find myself sharing my story more than I had ever anticipated, but I guess it helps brings it home to people that bowel cancer really could affect anyone. It also helps get over that hurdle of foreign-ness (why is this 'pakeha' here to tell us what to do? She doesn't know us or our culture, what is the DHB thinking?!)</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, to mark this occasion, here are some comments based on my experience of both cancer and my work:</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
1. <b>Not everyone knows what you mean by 'bowel'.</b> Actually, when I think back to my own diagnosis, I wasn't entirely clear if all these terms meant the same thing either: bowel cancer, colon cancer and colorectal cancer being pretty much interchangeable. I had a rectal cancer, so a particular type of bowel cancer.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Talking to some kids at a Pasifika event, we also talked about guts, intestines, the connection between your stomach and where the waste comes out... </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The NZ national bowel screening website has a description of the bowel here:</div>
<div>
<a href="https://www.nsu.govt.nz/national-bowel-screening-programme/about-bowel-cancer">https://www.nsu.govt.nz/national-bowel-screening-programme/about-bowel-cancer</a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And the Bowel Cancer UK site, has a 3D style of model with more info here:</div>
<div>
<a href="https://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/about-bowel-cancer/the-bowel/">https://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/about-bowel-cancer/the-bowel/</a> </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
2. <b>Talking about poo without actually saying poo. </b>Some cultures are much better at talking about poo than others. Unfortunately in some it is really a taboo. In NZ, the screening test involves dipping a small stick (part of the test kit) into your poo to collect a sample. People think this sounds a bit icky, but it is simple to do and non-invasive. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Knowing that some cultures find certain words taboo, means you end up picking your words carefully or pausing as if to put inverted commas around the word. Options are poop, number two, bowel motion (OK if you've already gone through the explanation of what your bowel is), 'sample', faeces. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The Scots have fewer scruples than Pacific Islanders in this regard! Get the sound on for the poo song:</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/UrwA_p8H6WY" width="560"></iframe>
<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Love this bit: Don't be snobby, test your jobby!<br />
<br />
<b>3. My cancer wasn't caught early... but it wasn't caught too late (obviously!)</b><br />
Bowel cancer caught early is very treatable. Fantastic survival rates for diagnosis at stage 1 (localised tumour, no spread to lymph nodes, still within bowel). Very poor outcomes for stage 4 (where cancer has spread to other organs such as liver or lungs).<br />
<br />
For me, I was stage 3 - the tumour was edging through the muscle wall of the rectum, and a couple of lymph nodes were affected. The way that staging is described is confusing because the stage of the tumour is not necessarily the overall staging related to the Dukes A, B, C system. So my tumour was described as T4 because it was locally advanced.<br />
<br />
How come I wasn't diagnosed earlier? There was an assumption that my problem was an internal haemorrhoid. I was young for bowel cancer and not in a high risk group. I never suspected cancer.<br />
<br />
One of the great things about screening is the opportunity to prevent cancer even forming in the first place. People with a positive result in their screening test (showing abnormal amounts of blood in their sample) are are invited in for further investigation by colonoscopy. If polyps are found during the colonoscopy, they can be removed there and then before they even have an opportunity to turn cancerous. Many patients in Hutt Valley have already benefited from this since the screening programme went live in July. Yay.<br />
<br />
<br />
There are lots of other things I could say or comment on, but this is already a long post now. Just briefly for anyone who didn't know me at the time, my cancer treatment involved radiotherapy, surgery and chemo. Susannah was not even two years old when I was diagnosed. I didn't lose my hair, but chemo sucked. I have a permanent colostomy. Radiation to the pelvis brings on menopause. I more or less kept dancing. I more or less kept an exceptionally positive outlook. I was lucky.<br />
<br />
Oh yes... and that was the start of my blogging (initially on the Macmillan Cancer Support forum). Thank you to Elspeth for suggesting it would be a good way to keep people up to date with my progress. She was right, it was a good way to share what was going on, but more than that. It was therapeutic and helped me to explore writing in a way I never would have before. One of the silver linings on the cancer cloud.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-daj74iwxahA/Wg6wDLI7ACI/AAAAAAAAAoM/OS0wDD0Enh8PvUECxSGydIBIz2rILYiXACLcBGAs/s1600/299964_10150295906852372_7643503_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="375" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-daj74iwxahA/Wg6wDLI7ACI/AAAAAAAAAoM/OS0wDD0Enh8PvUECxSGydIBIz2rILYiXACLcBGAs/s320/299964_10150295906852372_7643503_n.jpg" width="166" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
This photo is from August 2011. After the year of treatment, I did a year of fundraising for Macmillan Cancer Support - a fantastic UK charity that I had benefited from - and this was one of the publicity photos taken in the back garden.<br />
<br />
I am happy to answer questions about any of my experience if anyone wants to know more.<br />
<br />
And don't forget the words of the ditty: Don't be snobby, check your jobby!<br />
<br />
Take care dear friends x<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-52722146003268174922017-06-25T10:48:00.003+01:002017-06-25T10:56:43.589+01:00Being a ballet mumIf this blog was really an account of my life as a ballet mum, it would have never been so busy as the past few weeks.<br />
<br />
Dance for Pippa, and gymnastics for Susannah, have filled our extracurricular timetable like never before. It is wonderful that they are having so much opportunity to pursue their passions, but at times it is all consuming. When do we get time to do anything as a family these days? Hardly ever.<br />
<br />
I am not so much ballet mum as taxi mum. Susannah: training four days a week, and now competing in womens artistic gymnastics step 3 level. Pippa: ballet and jazz, plus private lessons and practices for competitions.<br />
<br />
Competitions were not something we navigated in the UK, but they feature regularly in the performing arts world here. They are something of a marathon - dance after dance for different age groups and genres. But despite the full-on nature of these events, it is wonderful to see the stars of the future - there is plenty of young talent - and even those who are clearly not destined for a career on the stage are a joy to watch with the energy and enthusiasm they bring. As a performer it is a fantastic opportunity to dance on stage and it complements the technique being learnt in class. Unfortunately it's incredibly expensive too (especially with the need to invest in costumes and private lessons) but we tighten our belts in some areas to allow this side of life to flourish. (Yes, I am aware it is a privilege to be in this position.)<br />
<br />
There are moments when it does just feel all a bit too much. Is this what life is all about? It is not balanced, and while I am all up for grabbing opportunities as they arise, I also like a bit of balance.<br />
In the rush from one place to another, one event to the next, it is nice to have a break some times. I find myself getting tetchy when it feels as though all I am doing is being the chauffeur or the chef.<br />
<br />
Does it sound like I'm moaning? I'm not intending to moan. Just recognising that when you are pulled in several directions at once - and you haven't touched that part-written novel since February - you need to find a way of carving out some space! Work has been busy too needless to say. <br />
<br />
Fortunately, this weekend has been competition-free and here I am writing the first blog post in an age. And now I am ready to embrace the role of ballet mum again! The Instagram account for the Dairy of a Ballet Mum is running and I'm all set to add some new pages here. Watch this space...<br />
<br />
In the meantime, here are some pics from recent weeks.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-d5s6C7VAmNU/WU-BAC7DTiI/AAAAAAAAAjE/1lxcxPDsDdsND1QgtcTJ7iRjUr1w9MhZQCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_1712.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-d5s6C7VAmNU/WU-BAC7DTiI/AAAAAAAAAjE/1lxcxPDsDdsND1QgtcTJ7iRjUr1w9MhZQCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_1712.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Taking dance pics for a photography comp</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-VDk3q3nRS7A/WU-Brp81jcI/AAAAAAAAAjM/tNIy7OALgXwuMhe8IcjZ-21-BLutkXRwwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_1664%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-VDk3q3nRS7A/WU-Brp81jcI/AAAAAAAAAjM/tNIy7OALgXwuMhe8IcjZ-21-BLutkXRwwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_1664%2B2.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yay! First place for restricted classical ballet solo</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9cO80Hj-MT4/WU-BxTZ5KSI/AAAAAAAAAjQ/0mfHsH7mG5cwbPyqhU-wBknjqgU87fjtwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_1626.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9cO80Hj-MT4/WU-BxTZ5KSI/AAAAAAAAAjQ/0mfHsH7mG5cwbPyqhU-wBknjqgU87fjtwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_1626.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Silver for floor :-)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-39193237409151758732017-03-16T10:09:00.001+00:002017-03-16T10:27:04.848+00:00Being a little bit fabulous"A woman is like a tea bag. You never know how strong she is until she is in hot water."<br />
<br />
I love this quote from Eleanor Roosevelt. It encapsulates pretty much what I've been thinking about today: how you never know how you will respond to a cancer diagnosis until it happens to you.<br />
<br />
I hadn't come across the tea bag quote before until I first opened Nicola Bourne's book 'The fabulous woman's guide through cancer'. What a coincidence that it leapt out at me again when revisiting the book this evening for this blog post.<br />
<br />
When I was diagnosed, I was lucky to find I was made of stern stuff. Most commentators would say I was remarkably positive, and of course I was blessed to be supported by so many friends and family. When I look back at that time, I allow myself a moment of pride, because for some of it (not all, but some) I was actually a little bit fabulous.<br />
<br />
But fabulous or otherwise, going through a cancer journey is no walk in the park. I drew inspiration and encouragement from the blog posts of people who were going through similar experiences. If it had been published at the time, I expect I would have gained much from reading the fabulous woman's guide.<br />
<br />
The format is great for dipping into. Nicola describes her own experiences of cancer in themed chapters which are peppered with tips, wise words, and anecdotes, and feature contributions from a wide range of women who have their own experiences to share. The guide covers so many aspects of cancer it would be a long list to name them all, but it includes telling friends and family (and children), working life, treatment, the emotional roller coaster, nutrition and exercise, and making 'your soul smile'. My own very small contribution to the book is about travel during treatment. Yes, I was honoured to have been invited to write a few paragraphs.<br />
<br />
The book has a compassionate tone. It reminds us that we need to be kind to ourselves, and to take each day as it comes. It acknowledges there will be bad days as well as encouraging us to make the most of better days. I like this tip: "Remember every mother, cancer or no cancer, has fabulous and not so fabulous moments, hours and days." Perhaps Nicola's next book should be a fabulous woman's guide through life in general!<br />
<br />
Nicola is promoting 'The fabulous women's guide through cancer' with a virtual book tour at the moment, and I am more than happy to recommend it here in New Zealand (I'm pretty sure you can order it from pretty much anywhere!). If you'd like to find out more, please go to: <a href="https://nicolabourne.com/">https://nicolabourne.com</a>.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SHd2iWjsjQk/WMpkzwBdrgI/AAAAAAAAAfg/CoOBEwXpaGYHJ8j15mlfexSb8C2QAbV1gCLcB/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2017-03-16%2Bat%2B11.17.14%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SHd2iWjsjQk/WMpkzwBdrgI/AAAAAAAAAfg/CoOBEwXpaGYHJ8j15mlfexSb8C2QAbV1gCLcB/s320/Screen%2BShot%2B2017-03-16%2Bat%2B11.17.14%2BPM.png" width="207" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-77120502068439397122016-12-26T23:45:00.001+00:002016-12-26T23:45:36.727+00:00A different Christmas<div>
It's been a weird time recently. Lovely in many ways, but rather odd.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Christmas in the summer shouldn't be a hard concept to grasp. It sounds fun. Let's head to the beach for a luxury picnic or barbecue! We'll bask in the sunshine without a care in the world!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
When we knew we would be having our first Christmas in the southern hemisphere, I hadn't really appreciated how much Christmas isn't just about the day itself, or even the few days either side. It is seasonally ingrained, and the period of Advent reinforces the anticipation. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It never 'felt' like Christmas this year. The lightness of the evenings means you don't have that childhood pleasure of seeing of the sparkly Christmas lights in windows and on high streets. There is greenery and colour all around in the natural world, why bother to bring evergreens into the house augmented by baubles for colour? We have hydrangeas from the garden above our fireplace this year. It is hard to get a cosy glow from candles and wood burners, if you've not had to wrap up against the elements and fight the winter chill. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Some things about Christmases past are best avoided. I don't like the commercialisation of Christmas - who does? - with the constant bombardment of advertising, and by and large this year's change of scene means we have skipped much of that. Sure, there are Christmas adverts here too, but the whole thing seems less frenzied.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Also, adding to the sense of being a bit more laid back, we are early into a long summer holiday season. The schools broke up on 16 Dec and don't go back until the beginning of February. We had days at the beach before Christmas and have plenty more to look forward to afterwards - including an actual summer holiday away in January. <div style="text-align: right;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-pnPYqJD9NEU/WGGfEAe0AWI/AAAAAAAAAcg/fFbm6vf4JfwkhgSsm9cqGKhAhIL0EmltwCLcB/s1600/IMG_0304.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-pnPYqJD9NEU/WGGfEAe0AWI/AAAAAAAAAcg/fFbm6vf4JfwkhgSsm9cqGKhAhIL0EmltwCLcB/s320/IMG_0304.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
That said, the weather is unpredictable. The winds could have been howling, and the rain could have been battering down. There was no knowing if winter coats may after all have been required. Just because you know someone hopping over waves in their best bikini somewhere in Australia doesn't mean it is baking everywhere south of the equator! Sunshine is not guaranteed! We were lucky - it was breezy but fair (about 19 degrees?) and the water was just warm enough for a dip.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But of course what has made this Christmas a tough one despite this seaside fun, is the huge distance between us and loved ones. For me, Christmas is about family. I was blessed with many happy Christmases throughout my childhood, which included catching up with grandparents and extended family too. Until this year, this pattern was replicated for our own family - we'd be with one set of grandparents on Christmas day itself, and meet up with the others shortly before or after. Dates would be juggled and motorways tackled to fit in siblings and, with luck, some close friends too. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Once again, I let myself down with the lack of Christmas cards sent. Good intentions thwarted... well, I have excuses lined up but do you really need to hear them? It is now several years since I have achieved what I aspire to in this regard.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But, please don't think that a lack of Christmas greeting, a lack of card doesn't mean that I haven't been thinking about you. Also, I am so very grateful for everyone who has taken the time to send a message or card. Thank you. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Next year will be easier I think. This year was so different, it was hard to think how to make it special while being true to both ourselves and our new environment. Now we see we have enjoyed new things that could happily become annual traditions: pavlova with seasonal berries for dessert, Christmas swimming, FaceTime our Christmas morning while it is still Christmas Eve in the UK, and then again in the evening. I would be very happy for my Boxing Day morning walk to be a regular event. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Also, we count our blessings. We are in a beautiful, friendly country. We are not mourning loved ones, we are just missing them. The global political situation aside, there is much to look forward to in the coming year.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This morning I was reminded (thank you Facebook) that four years ago, I blogged about belated festive greetings. So here it is again! Wishing you a very happy rest of 2016. May your 2017 be filled with love, laughter, hope, kindness and friendship. xxxx</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-QoyATO8-Msc/WGGmmJ016nI/AAAAAAAAAc8/JKJVdPiX4YwlzoiZIZ21pj0C9tIZitJTACEw/s1600/IMG_0373.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="174" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-QoyATO8-Msc/WGGmmJ016nI/AAAAAAAAAc8/JKJVdPiX4YwlzoiZIZ21pj0C9tIZitJTACEw/s200/IMG_0373.jpg" width="200" /> </a><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3OZX4sWgAUQ/WGGmhlQa5rI/AAAAAAAAAdU/40taQHf_TyMnNG5Wlm590iFG0DJA5SkHACEw/s1600/IMG_0387.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="138" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3OZX4sWgAUQ/WGGmhlQa5rI/AAAAAAAAAdU/40taQHf_TyMnNG5Wlm590iFG0DJA5SkHACEw/s200/IMG_0387.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-TWCSa0ehiBc/WGGmmDxZZaI/AAAAAAAAAdA/ORylvdqrCCo-ZtO_ziHXNqx4gjd0c2TmgCEw/s1600/IMG_0379.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-TWCSa0ehiBc/WGGmmDxZZaI/AAAAAAAAAdA/ORylvdqrCCo-ZtO_ziHXNqx4gjd0c2TmgCEw/s200/IMG_0379.jpg" width="164" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-khsiMsz8s-0/WGGmyiX_hYI/AAAAAAAAAdM/gQEn4LuLLnAqfTIhr2w-n8exNOOeTR4ZQCEw/s1600/IMG_0419.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-khsiMsz8s-0/WGGmyiX_hYI/AAAAAAAAAdM/gQEn4LuLLnAqfTIhr2w-n8exNOOeTR4ZQCEw/s200/IMG_0419.JPG" width="200" /> </a><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/--AtFotbPq8Y/WGGmqjcXQVI/AAAAAAAAAdE/Bz7djAEGpx0mGoL9X-9nHGE9GEr_20kMQCEw/s1600/IMG_0426.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/--AtFotbPq8Y/WGGmqjcXQVI/AAAAAAAAAdE/Bz7djAEGpx0mGoL9X-9nHGE9GEr_20kMQCEw/s200/IMG_0426.JPG" width="150" /></a><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7ybOszktT_4/WGGm2kUmakI/AAAAAAAAAdQ/i-pACj_3Jt8z_GkzVRHlw4szTL6fO_RJACEw/s1600/IMG_0429.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7ybOszktT_4/WGGm2kUmakI/AAAAAAAAAdQ/i-pACj_3Jt8z_GkzVRHlw4szTL6fO_RJACEw/s200/IMG_0429.JPG" width="150" /></a></div>
<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<span style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: #bd081c; background-image: url(data:image/svg+xml; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 450px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1278px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span><span style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: #bd081c; background-image: url(data:image/svg+xml; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 450px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1278px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span>Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-53109662804828474442016-09-16T23:10:00.000+01:002016-09-16T23:13:04.209+01:00More kindness in the world please!What on earth is going on in the UK?<br />
<br />
Why is corporate greed winning over common decency?<br />
<br />
Do those in positions of responsibility and influence not care about the human race and the planet we inhabit?<br />
<br />
Of course the answer is that a huge number of people with responsibility and influence do care. They care very passionately, but it is hard to see any of this being translated into good decision-making at government level. The government, I would argue, does not care.<br />
<br />
I don't think the British people will look back on this moment of history with pride: failing to help children from war-torn countries, privatising the NHS, allowing (if not positively encouraging) the sale of weapons to oppressive regimes, demolishing the welfare state, undermining democratic processes in elections... the depressing list goes on.<br />
<br />
It is strange witnessing this from the other side of the world. Some problems are world-wide of course. Britain has done a few things that should be held up as exemplars, it's worth remembering that it's not all bad. Charging for plastic bags was a great step in the right direction for minimising their use, for example. I was surprised that re-using bags doesn't seem as commonplace here in NZ. (Plastics depress me. I still have far too much plastic in my life. I don't dedicate my life to avoiding them, but my awareness of their environmental impact makes me feel a mixture of guilt, impotency and frustration.)<br />
<br />
As a migrant to NZ I have been aware of how different my experience is from that of an asylum seeker. With a visa in place I was welcomed at the airport. I can apply for jobs. We have unquestioned access to education and health care services. I have the language to ask everything I need to know.<br />
<br />
The move was expensive but we were able to bring our possessions with us, and familiar things around us has helped us settle. I smile to see our books on the shelves, the blanket box which once belonged to grandparents, the Supermum mug the girls' gave me a few years ago. So many small things which turn the house into a home. It is hard to imagine what it must be like to leave home with nothing but fear, a phone, some money, a favourite photo or two.<br />
<br />
I hope that my experiences here will make me more welcoming to strangers. I have appreciated the kindnesses we were offered on arrival, and the emphasis on inclusive community in general.<br />
<br />
In terms of what is happening in Britain and what the future may hold, I was heartened to read some of the recent resources shared by Young Quakers. I knew that they had published their 'Living our beliefs' book, but this week was the first time I properly dipped into it. I really liked it, and hope it will be a positive influence for all ages. Thank you to the team who worked on it.<br />
<br />
I love that they have created a resource that quotes Mahatma Gandhi alongside David Mitchell (Ghostwritten), established Quaker writings, and even Elvis!<br />
<br />
You can find out more here: <a href="http://www.yqspace.org.uk/living-our-beliefs">http://www.yqspace.org.uk/living-our-beliefs</a><br />
<br />
All we can really do in response to the rot is to continue to breathe life into our beliefs. I suspect I am have said similar in previous posts, but it is how I feel and is worth repeating. We need to lead by example showing love and respect, supporting things that are good in the world, avoiding inadvertent support for things that harm. We can start small if it is too overwhelming to start big. A small act of kindness can make someone's day.<br />
<br />
The Young Quakers' 'Living our beliefs' contains a great reminder of the words of Gandhi:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DYRlV1hSf-s/V9xofVggoFI/AAAAAAAAAZ0/YOIks1qv2GccpHX3xMdFnVDBX7ZN16nPwCLcB/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2016-09-17%2Bat%2B9.46.04%2BAM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="162" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DYRlV1hSf-s/V9xofVggoFI/AAAAAAAAAZ0/YOIks1qv2GccpHX3xMdFnVDBX7ZN16nPwCLcB/s320/Screen%2BShot%2B2016-09-17%2Bat%2B9.46.04%2BAM.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #bd081c; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 193px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1008px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span><span style="background-color: #bd081c; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 193px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1008px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #bd081c; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 193px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1008px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span><span style="background-color: #bd081c; background-position: 3px 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: 14px; border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; border: none; color: white; cursor: pointer; display: none; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-style: normal; font-weight: bold; left: 193px; line-height: 20px; opacity: 1; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; position: absolute; text-align: center; text-indent: 20px; top: 1008px; width: auto; z-index: 8675309;">Save</span>Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-79258281103504395672016-07-27T03:16:00.001+01:002016-07-27T03:16:57.207+01:00Birdsong and feathered friendsWhen we arrived in New Zealand I thought all of the wildlife would be different, so I was somewhat surprised to be greeted by the sight of blackbirds and sparrows in the garden. Of course I now realise that the early European settlers brought many bird species with them, keen to be surrounded by some familiar feathered friends in their strange new world.<br />
<br />
However, it didn't take long to discover that these introduced domestic birds share their habitat with their native cousins. The tui (Maori name: <span>tūī - pronounced "too-ee") </span>are regular visitors to our patch, and their distinctive call reminds you that you are a long way from home. <br />
<br />
At first glance, the tui looks black with a white ruff at the throat, but catch it in the right light, and its coat is irridescent with dark green, blue and purple hues. Apparently they have a double voice box which enables them to create a range of sounds, and they mimic the call of other birds as well as throwing in their own chattering.<br />
<br />
I recorded this example on one of our first walks from home with the girls. It doesn't really do justice to the concerto of song we enjoyed, but it does give you an idea of how different this is from a starling (another familiar garden visitor) or a blackbird.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxV2-hHObIVe_DBQxobBQFIehxJOaCWlpVEXil0iYPVaIzePH4BdJ7yMcova3enuVfO8CXCiQOgmlpTzpjqvw' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe> </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Less vocal, but also easy to identify, are the fantails. I've only seen them in our own small garden a couple of times, but occasionally they can be seen around the neighbourhood - I think it may depend which bushes and trees are in flower at the time. No prize for guessing why they are called fantails. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Of the introduced birds, I am very happy to see a couple of thrush which seem to be thriving in their new home. I don't know whether it is the species, or a phase of evolution, but the markings of their speckled breasts seem to be especially pronounced.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br />Many of the other wonderful native and endemic birds we've seen have been at the local nature reserve - the fabulous Zealandia. I've posted pics of some of these already from the school trip I went on with Susannah, but here is a photo of the kaka (<span>kākā)</span>. We are probably fortunate that this is not a regular visitor to our garden as it is a noisy beast.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-GFhWv25Eflo/V4oBC0CDqkI/AAAAAAAAAXk/mTlgroYgFoMicxVSmPL7Z9Kn8S1kcuOfgCKgB/s1600/IMG_3602.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-GFhWv25Eflo/V4oBC0CDqkI/AAAAAAAAAXk/mTlgroYgFoMicxVSmPL7Z9Kn8S1kcuOfgCKgB/s320/IMG_3602.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Just for completeness perhaps I should also mention seabirds. The gulls look like the gulls of pretty much any coastline I've visited. Also by the shore we've spotted gannets, a lone kingfisher, cormorants and shag. The latter come in different forms, including the New Zealand pied shag with its white breast. There are many nesting at Zealandia. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nxZWMJOgeyQ/V5f2-a5TF8I/AAAAAAAAAYE/VcOeFV-MHJEklDkMHSWJXtudJU6df_h4wCLcB/s1600/IMG_3596.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nxZWMJOgeyQ/V5f2-a5TF8I/AAAAAAAAAYE/VcOeFV-MHJEklDkMHSWJXtudJU6df_h4wCLcB/s320/IMG_3596.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I perhaps come across as an avid bird watcher with this list of sightings, but I'm not really. I am just enjoying the novelty of the natural world around me. Although Wellington is a city, I am very grateful that birdsong is prominent in its soundscape. The twittering makes me smile, and as for hearing the vocal gymnastics of the tui, that smile often turns into a grin. While I may start to get used to it, I don't expect to ever tire of hearing it. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-46235469920709886332016-07-16T10:58:00.001+01:002016-07-16T11:10:45.357+01:00Letting kids be kidsWe've been here for a little over two months, and the girls have now had several weeks going to the local school.<br />
<br />
The school is much bigger than they were used to back in Stony Stratford - nearly 800 pupils from age 5 to 13. This could have made it daunting, but actually it really hasn't taken long for the girls to settle.<br />
<br />
There are some things we are sad to miss from the old school (particularly for Pippa: the school residential trip and the year six end of year performance) but on the other hand what a relief to be away from the pressure of the year 6 tests.<br />
<br />
The positives of the new school have far outweighed the negatives and it is refreshing to be in a school which is value-led but in a much more multi-cultural environment, without the expectation that everyone will be a Christian unless they expressly indicate they are something else.<br />
<br />
A few things about the school that make it different from the middle school they were used to:<br />
<ul>
<li>no uniform. Comfort is generally the key. Leggings, T-shirt, a warm layer and trainers is the usual look. The kids don't change for PE so when cross country is on the cards, a change of clothes in case of mud is suggested.</li>
<li>composite classes. This means each class spans two year groups - Susannah is in year 3 in a class that spans years 3 and 4 (the equivalent of English years 2 and 3 - she's gone from one of the youngest in the year group to one of the oldest); Pippa's in year 7 in a year 7/8 class. This means the age range per class is greater of course but it seems to work well, and it means you will get some new classmates every year. </li>
<li>less homework. So far Pippa's homework has seemed to consist of a weekly maths sheet, and Susannah's a reading log and a handful of spelling words that are comfortably within her grasp. We probably should be doing a bit more times tables practice at home, but there really isn't any pressure from school about this. It is a welcome change for all of us. Pippa's year 6 homework was onerous earlier this year and if it hadn't been started before the weekend you could kiss most of Sunday afternoon/evening good bye. </li>
<li>Maori. Actually they are learning far less Maori language than I had expected, but there are a few regular phases and common words in use. In their classes, the girls are learning Kapa haka - traditional performing arts (singing, but also some dancing). The national anthem is sung at assembly - first in Maori, then in English. Assembly happens twice per term. </li>
<li>choices and opportunity. This becomes more obvious in the senior classes, and Pippa has enjoyed being to make choices in her learning - which reading group to join based on the book being studied, and a choice of language for example. She chose Mandarin! </li>
<li>playgrounds. The school has fantastic outdoor space - not much greenery but adventure playground equipment and sports pitches. The headmaster believes kids need space to kick a ball around and this happens in separate areas to where people are climbing monkey bars or even trees. The outdoor space is also used during the school day when teachers decide it would be a good idea for the kids to be reading in fresh air for a change, or need a break in the middle of a lesson that's used a lot of concentration. The playgrounds can be visited out of school hours and we've been a couple of times during the school holidays in preference to the local park because there is more to climb on.</li>
<li>school dinners. This is a negative rather than a plus. Local takeaways provide the lunches on a given day, so unless you want a Subway one day, pizza the next, or sushi on Friday then it's packed lunches all the way. </li>
<li>stationery. Families provide school exercise books, pens, pencils according to lists provided by the school. This means there is quite a cost involved at the beginning of term. What you save in uniform costs, you spend on books.</li>
<li>the school year. This is probably obvious, but worth mentioning for completeness. The schools operate a four term system. The long holiday runs from Christmas through January to the beginning of Feb. The terms are about ten or eleven weeks long, with a two week break before the next begins. As I write we are mid-way through the two week holiday between terms 3 and 4. </li>
</ul>
Pippa is in an innovative teaching block - a novelty for the school as well as for her - and she really likes the atmosphere this creates. It is more like a common room with sofas and comfy chairs, and only a few desks. They use IT a lot, for example writing their own blogs, and doing project work together. <br />
<br />
So, all in all it's a big thumbs up for the school in New Zealand. I like it because it is more relaxed and they are learning interesting things. I also see it as a big plus that Pippa is not having to go to secondary school this year. She can enjoy being in primary school for that bit longer, and doesn't have to suddenly grow up as they tend to when making the transition to secondary.<br />
<br />
The girls like it because of the playgrounds and because they are having fun while they learn. They are allowed to be kids. <br />
<br />
If you'd like to see more about the school, the website is: <a href="http://www.kns.school.nz/">http://www.kns.school.nz/</a><br />
<br />
Here are a few photos from Susannah's school trip to the nearby nature reserve Zealandia. I went as a parent helper.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-mUlxQCkJlXk/V4oA9V8N9YI/AAAAAAAAAXg/jpigAs9eI3AYu_RIkJbug3dj0_8IlxYWACEw/s1600/IMG_3593.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-mUlxQCkJlXk/V4oA9V8N9YI/AAAAAAAAAXg/jpigAs9eI3AYu_RIkJbug3dj0_8IlxYWACEw/s320/IMG_3593.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-W_F901OYxG0/V4oA--n0WfI/AAAAAAAAAWo/32OUApea5JcvP6P3OToAA5DWU4fIUSaIQCEw/s1600/IMG_3594.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-W_F901OYxG0/V4oA--n0WfI/AAAAAAAAAWo/32OUApea5JcvP6P3OToAA5DWU4fIUSaIQCEw/s320/IMG_3594.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PZyGKSKE-jE/V4oA_KDOHJI/AAAAAAAAAWs/Oq_mPziRqykmtBUbPEKhBz9IzCocaUk4QCEw/s1600/IMG_3595.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PZyGKSKE-jE/V4oA_KDOHJI/AAAAAAAAAWs/Oq_mPziRqykmtBUbPEKhBz9IzCocaUk4QCEw/s320/IMG_3595.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OfkSlNh1LZ0/V4oBAbkAtiI/AAAAAAAAAW4/slhAdyppiQsemyNZDNDYtfEkeYZDlUj5gCEw/s1600/IMG_3598.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OfkSlNh1LZ0/V4oBAbkAtiI/AAAAAAAAAW4/slhAdyppiQsemyNZDNDYtfEkeYZDlUj5gCEw/s320/IMG_3598.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GFhWv25Eflo/V4oBC0CDqkI/AAAAAAAAAXE/_2i0qCugI1QZE-PjNfCOJXQ5YRKKncltgCEw/s1600/IMG_3602.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GFhWv25Eflo/V4oBC0CDqkI/AAAAAAAAAXE/_2i0qCugI1QZE-PjNfCOJXQ5YRKKncltgCEw/s320/IMG_3602.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XfHLRTy9YMo/V4oBFUXwkEI/AAAAAAAAAXM/zNkCDSNFizsWTbyfBxHTjXCsf7dVaHRzwCEw/s1600/IMG_3605.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XfHLRTy9YMo/V4oBFUXwkEI/AAAAAAAAAXM/zNkCDSNFizsWTbyfBxHTjXCsf7dVaHRzwCEw/s320/IMG_3605.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4N7YZRHqzFk/V4oBKDuKaAI/AAAAAAAAAXc/Kfn_RhMwOZ03Ge3edpgMsTrwV0cftBTPgCEw/s1600/IMG_3611.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4N7YZRHqzFk/V4oBKDuKaAI/AAAAAAAAAXc/Kfn_RhMwOZ03Ge3edpgMsTrwV0cftBTPgCEw/s320/IMG_3611.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-36149877411869301202016-06-26T11:47:00.001+01:002016-06-26T11:47:17.253+01:00We are still people who careThere is an enormous amount of grief, disbelief and anger, and in some quarters jubilation, about recent historic events in the UK.<br />
<br />
Having declared myself in the 'Remain' camp in advance of the referendum, it will not come as a surprise that I was greatly saddened by the result. However, I find I am more bewildered than angry. <br />
<br />
<ol>
</ol>
First of all, I'm rubbish at being angry - I'm all tears in no time. I struggle to know where to direct the anger. Possibly this comes hand in hand with being empathetic: I don't like anger being directed at me, so don't want to direct that on someone else which means it inevitably becomes an internal mess. I do know people who voted leave and they are not suddenly my enemy. I care about them too. That's not to say I never get angry - a handful of people make my blood boil, Nigel Farage being one of them - but I still finding it hugely unsettling to get into that destructive frame of mind. I am more of a quiet moper in these situations than a shouty, sweary person.<br />
<br />
Secondly, although the Brexit campaign 'won', in truth I don't really think it would ever be a winning situation for either side. More than 15 million people voted to stay in the EU. That is a huge number of people. The remain campaign wasn't entirely unsuccessful - it just wasn't successful enough. People on both sides of the debate became impassioned by what they believe in. That said, it was awful to see how negative the campaigning was, and although a lot of argument was about what people believe in - it was also about what people fear. Shame on those that exploited the fear element to persuade people to their view. The referendum has divided the population of the UK very nearly 50-50. There would have been work to do, to heal the division, whichever side came out in front.<br />
<br />
We fear the future, but we still don't actually know what the reality will be. We mustn't become impotent and unable to be part of shaping a future that we believe is right, even if the foundations we would have chosen are no longer available. When there is change there is also opportunity.<br />
<br />
The worst thing in my opinion is the hatred that has been unleashed. It is sickening to the core to hear of individuals being attacked for the way they look or dress - an assumption that they should be sent home when the UK is the only home they have ever known. And I am horrified that as a nation we don't seem to have more respect for people who have come to the UK with the best of intentions - to work hard, to contribute, to make a better world for their families and for us all. Horrified that we don't have more hospitality to offer those who arrive traumatised and in desperation, who have struggled to escape their homeland because it has been ripped apart by war and they are seeking refuge only to find there is none. <br />
<br />
The vote was one monumental day in our history. It was one choice we had to make that had such enormous repercussions. But every day we have choices to make and we need to keep working towards a better world.<br />
<br />
In New Zealand there is an emphasis on building resilience - in buildings and communities. Neighbourly-ness is encouraged, with an awareness that if the big one strikes [earthquake] a thriving community will cope better and recover more quickly.<br />
<br />
In the UK, communities now need to rebuild, and as individuals we need to model the behaviour we want to see: treating friends and strangers with an open mind and an open heart. We all have a different story to tell. Our voting preferences are one part of us, our ethnic background another. But we are all people facing ups and downs in our lives - some on a harder path than others. We need to stand up to aggression, so that violence and hatred don't become normalised. We need to challenge inequalities in society, for this is another source of division. We need to be gentle with each other and gentle to ourselves. At the end of the day we are all people, and generally we are all still people who care. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<ol>
</ol>
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-41504521003891208362016-06-08T12:09:00.001+01:002016-06-08T12:12:44.853+01:00Finding our feet and homesickness<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-el_c2iod3gk/V1f6V5KYUAI/AAAAAAAAAUk/yr3QoCsG9Js2lKUmhVBqPXLj9mGNviVWQCKgB/s1600/IMG_3489.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-el_c2iod3gk/V1f6V5KYUAI/AAAAAAAAAUk/yr3QoCsG9Js2lKUmhVBqPXLj9mGNviVWQCKgB/s200/IMG_3489.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
We've been here for about four weeks now. We've been busy trying to set down some roots to make us feel more at home.<br />
<br />
In the first week we joined the library, enrolled the girls at school and made enquiries about gymnastics. Since then they've managed a play date each and we've met up with the very small number of people we knew here before we came. I've been to the Quaker meeting and we're sussing out dance classes for both the girls and me.<br />
<br />
With the girls out at school I have kept up with the work I've been doing for the UK-based College of Mental Health Pharmacy.<br />
<br />
Weekends have been busy with plenty of exploring, highlights being finding great walks to do from home, visiting the marine education centre at Island Bay, seeing seals close by in the seal colony, a wonderful day at Makara beach only 20 minutes from home, and enjoying the Sunday market at the Harbourside.<br />
<br />
A full happy time and there are lots of photos of us smiling.<br />
<br />
But, of course, it is not as simple as that. <br />
<br />
The girls are terribly homesick at the moment. They are missing friends and family: school friends, Holiday School friends, cousins, grandparents... walking down the street and seeing familiar, friendly faces. They are missing their usual home comforts (the house here is very sparse with the majority of our belongings still on their way in a shipping container). They are missing their usual activities and routines. It is hard to see them so sad.<br />
<br />
So, it is each day as it comes. We are loving the beauty of the place, the outdoor opportunities, and the variety of the city. When we are absorbed in an outing or activity as a family we are genuinely enjoying ourselves, but there are plenty of times at home when we are having to administer tissues, cuddles and soothing words.<br />
<br />
We've been calling this our New Zealand adventure - and I guess having an adventure means being ready to take the rough with the smooth. It will take time, but I am sure we will gradually find our feet and the homesickness will hit less frequently and with less intensity. In the meantime we'll continue to make connections and make the most of what life has to offer here.<br />
<br />
Here are some photos of what we've been up to in the first month. <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Kw-d0PINFc8/V1f00_YS7uI/AAAAAAAAAOQ/LQXlYV4zUCQMx4Dv5p7Qzl9Rzb-jpdzhQCLcB/s1600/IMG_3389.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Kw-d0PINFc8/V1f00_YS7uI/AAAAAAAAAOQ/LQXlYV4zUCQMx4Dv5p7Qzl9Rzb-jpdzhQCLcB/s200/IMG_3389.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A view from Wright's Hill Reserve - a walk from home</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7uZcKwJI1Lc/V1f02IZ7mAI/AAAAAAAAAOY/ZdVTF7ti_dIs1G9d4dDuYW0OSED42cYXQCLcB/s1600/IMG_3390.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7uZcKwJI1Lc/V1f02IZ7mAI/AAAAAAAAAOY/ZdVTF7ti_dIs1G9d4dDuYW0OSED42cYXQCLcB/s200/IMG_3390.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Wright's Hill Reserve look out point</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-T9p0WFxJdJE/V1f025oQxPI/AAAAAAAAAOg/P7WXkvs8sm0ys1MObDtFKmWlaQ5JB0QYgCLcB/s1600/IMG_3391.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-T9p0WFxJdJE/V1f025oQxPI/AAAAAAAAAOg/P7WXkvs8sm0ys1MObDtFKmWlaQ5JB0QYgCLcB/s200/IMG_3391.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Wright's Hill Reserve look out point</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QMB7LvzY92U/V1f03mITjiI/AAAAAAAAAOo/kUTfaOA8Rr4-lowhxV3DLmqXpKNaAyrjgCLcB/s1600/IMG_3396.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QMB7LvzY92U/V1f03mITjiI/AAAAAAAAAOo/kUTfaOA8Rr4-lowhxV3DLmqXpKNaAyrjgCLcB/s200/IMG_3396.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Trying out the outdoor gym equipment at nearby Karori Park</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EI2apbdQNZM/V1f04T5OEKI/AAAAAAAAAOw/JDNwyr-PZJAn4uWDOB7aH89a4Cuni1cbACLcB/s1600/IMG_3401.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EI2apbdQNZM/V1f04T5OEKI/AAAAAAAAAOw/JDNwyr-PZJAn4uWDOB7aH89a4Cuni1cbACLcB/s200/IMG_3401.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hands on tank at the Marine Education Centre</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YZoXgunqEvY/V1f5np-tH-I/AAAAAAAAAUM/v00RyLTeb089Pc0x4lY4jh5bDrA_TJGOQCKgB/s1600/IMG_3420.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YZoXgunqEvY/V1f5np-tH-I/AAAAAAAAAUM/v00RyLTeb089Pc0x4lY4jh5bDrA_TJGOQCKgB/s200/IMG_3420.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">View from the Skyline Walkway - a walk from home</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xDUahyHSiTY/V1f6IkCmmgI/AAAAAAAAAUk/pVDhOqBt880dx709jkW6iQViIDJEU2J7ACKgB/s1600/IMG_3481.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xDUahyHSiTY/V1f6IkCmmgI/AAAAAAAAAUk/pVDhOqBt880dx709jkW6iQViIDJEU2J7ACKgB/s200/IMG_3481.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">T-shirt weather in winter! - Makara Beach</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aBXt8ifkVjM/V1f5uiyfACI/AAAAAAAAAUM/CdLzEjHX3XkxERKlZtxGU87fl8bHY7pEwCKgB/s1600/IMG_3435.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aBXt8ifkVjM/V1f5uiyfACI/AAAAAAAAAUM/CdLzEjHX3XkxERKlZtxGU87fl8bHY7pEwCKgB/s200/IMG_3435.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Susannah's seal picture</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DAbjq-Drsfs/V1f6SqXfmRI/AAAAAAAAAUk/NnpEVIN0NfEGfMEnEUCbPST-zawN8vqEQCKgB/s1600/IMG_3487.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DAbjq-Drsfs/V1f6SqXfmRI/AAAAAAAAAUk/NnpEVIN0NfEGfMEnEUCbPST-zawN8vqEQCKgB/s200/IMG_3487.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cafe at Makara Beach</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DisdNKSic-A/V1f6L9HKGOI/AAAAAAAAAUk/JIRljBixfOg5BfHNq-i9wc0gHNatjii1ACKgB/s1600/IMG_3483.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DisdNKSic-A/V1f6L9HKGOI/AAAAAAAAAUk/JIRljBixfOg5BfHNq-i9wc0gHNatjii1ACKgB/s200/IMG_3483.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">View from cliffs by Makara Beach</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-29866067277748376442016-05-30T23:36:00.001+01:002016-06-01T00:16:52.916+01:00First days exploringI had spent so long saying to the girls how much I was looking forward to living by the sea, Susannah was rather disappointed to find that our house is not a sea front property with immediate access to a beach.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7wGQYt8e31o/V0yyR5KZ9SI/AAAAAAAAAM0/OSvcwVXGL-k5k6YsNwLbvF3LTtDtGRKXgCLcB/s1600/IMG_3311.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7wGQYt8e31o/V0yyR5KZ9SI/AAAAAAAAAM0/OSvcwVXGL-k5k6YsNwLbvF3LTtDtGRKXgCLcB/s200/IMG_3311.JPG" width="200" /></a>But, it is only a bus journey away. On our first morning in New Zealand we were keen to start exploring. We bought our 'Snapper' cards for the bus and headed into the centre. After the long flights followed by fitful jet-lagged sleep, it was wonderful to get to the harbour - looking sparkly in the Autumn sun. It had been a stormy night, but we have had a rapid introduction to the changing weather of Wellington - blowing a gale one minute, and clear blue skies the next. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-rPzv2AwcJKI/V0yxxIUOPuI/AAAAAAAAAM4/QpFxvnGPcxQbUWnJNqdY4uYTotskzqmdwCKgB/s1600/IMG_3318.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-rPzv2AwcJKI/V0yxxIUOPuI/AAAAAAAAAM4/QpFxvnGPcxQbUWnJNqdY4uYTotskzqmdwCKgB/s200/IMG_3318.JPG" width="150" /></a>Occasionally dolphins and rays can be seen in the waters, but I suspect not all that often and we made do with some little fish darting along the harbour edge. Bruce introduced me to the NZ cafe culture with my first flat white, and we wandered along to the museum <a href="https://www.tepapa.govt.nz/" target="_blank">Te Papa</a>.<br />
<br />
We concentrated on the natural history section, including some hands on activities and even the opportunity to crawl through a life size model of a blue whale heart! <br />
<br />
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-izQQMupOc74/V0yxV7ry-II/AAAAAAAAAMo/afcAWjVW2tctOQClzrUjmH9Gu0cyw9uGACKgB/s1600/IMG_3317.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-izQQMupOc74/V0yxV7ry-II/AAAAAAAAAMo/afcAWjVW2tctOQClzrUjmH9Gu0cyw9uGACKgB/s200/IMG_3317.JPG" width="150" /></a>On the second day we were back down into the centre. We were starting to notice errors in our packing - my waterproof in a shipping container instead of plane luggage. So we did a mixture of shopping and absorbing the sights and sounds of Wellington.<br />
<br />
Looking back, these early days are a bit of a blur. We hit huge waves of tiredness in the late afternoon or early evening. But we also managed to buy groceries and get meals on the table. I obtained an NZ driving licence (a straight forward, friendly process). We unpacked, and the girls tried to work out how to personalise their rooms in the absence of their usual home comforts.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-CDhkPAVEIgc/V0yx-xZ6XuI/AAAAAAAAAM4/py3FFQ9meHM04G-xtUA0hWASTcueGTkyQCKgB/s1600/IMG_3321.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-CDhkPAVEIgc/V0yx-xZ6XuI/AAAAAAAAAM4/py3FFQ9meHM04G-xtUA0hWASTcueGTkyQCKgB/s200/IMG_3321.JPG" width="150" /></a>Also, early in our time here we had a lovely treat from our next door
neighbours. Their elder daughter (who is a year younger than Pippa) made
a fabulous chocolate cake to welcome us. She came in with her parents
and sister to chat a bit. It was great to meet some friendly faces
nearby and find out more about the local school and amenities from them.<br />
<br />
On Sunday, I went to the Quaker meeting. I hadn't necessarily thought I would get there on the first weekend with the need to settle as a family, but in the end it seemed natural to fit it in and I was off again on our number 3 bus that seems to serve us well from suburb to town.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-INnRn4Y4DUI/V0yyxfkCQJI/AAAAAAAAANw/GPMxAKM_u-ISFxDIBg05WERf1mBmPHQlgCKgB/s1600/IMG_3346.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-INnRn4Y4DUI/V0yyxfkCQJI/AAAAAAAAANw/GPMxAKM_u-ISFxDIBg05WERf1mBmPHQlgCKgB/s200/IMG_3346.JPG" width="200" /></a>On Sunday afternoon we went for a drive: more views - this time from the top of Mount Victoria, and a 'proper' beach at Scorching Bay.<br />
<br />
From Mount Victoria you can see across the harbour to hills beyond. Although Wellington surrounds a harbour it also has peninsulas so you can see sea and mountains in lots of directions. If you lose your bearings, there is a large sculpture pointing due south.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TIHj6hy-BhU/V0yyyOXtpfI/AAAAAAAAANw/bzc1iK4HICgj4g_Wbgzwo_Ud2_YgchdRwCKgB/s1600/IMG_3348.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TIHj6hy-BhU/V0yyyOXtpfI/AAAAAAAAANw/bzc1iK4HICgj4g_Wbgzwo_Ud2_YgchdRwCKgB/s200/IMG_3348.JPG" width="150" /></a>We chose Scorching Bay for our beach visit largely because we liked the name of its cafe Scorch o Rama! Also, on-line recommendations suggested it was one of the best beaches in the area.<br />
<br />
We weren't disappointed. It is indeed a lovely spot and I'm sure we'll visit again. It is too cold for
bathing this time of year, but bare foot is perfectly acceptable and
quite the norm for Kiwis. <br />
<br />
The Cafe will also no doubt receive multiple visits. Ice creams, brownies, coffees: all good!<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-kdvoULHTebs/V0yyzs9QhnI/AAAAAAAAANw/_efsW-_ZnTobMLI0LHCVYkBpyL1_tiKiQCKgB/s1600/IMG_3352.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-kdvoULHTebs/V0yyzs9QhnI/AAAAAAAAANw/_efsW-_ZnTobMLI0LHCVYkBpyL1_tiKiQCKgB/s200/IMG_3352.JPG" width="150" /></a>Our first weekend drew to a close, and with Bruce going back to work it felt as though we would need to start moving on from being tourists on holiday to longer term residents of this gem of a city.<br />
<br />
More on that anon...<br />
<br />
x<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ne5YeHbKcQI/V0yy0Bss4oI/AAAAAAAAANw/Z9M-lrE69kktR6WmJU2mlqyBEgUocbI3QCKgB/s1600/IMG_3355.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ne5YeHbKcQI/V0yy0Bss4oI/AAAAAAAAANw/Z9M-lrE69kktR6WmJU2mlqyBEgUocbI3QCKgB/s200/IMG_3355.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-88148524559032546102016-05-26T05:51:00.001+01:002016-05-26T05:51:59.168+01:00Welcome to Wellington<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6GK-o3hgRo0/V0Z8i96eM0I/AAAAAAAAAL8/auZephRaDJMkv2FvgVGIfcgSD473J8B3gCLcB/s1600/IMG_3310.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6GK-o3hgRo0/V0Z8i96eM0I/AAAAAAAAAL8/auZephRaDJMkv2FvgVGIfcgSD473J8B3gCLcB/s200/IMG_3310.jpg" width="150" /></a>We've been here two weeks now and already the journey seems a long time ago.<br />
<br />
We were lucky with the flights. Susannah hadn't been in a plane before, and Pippa was a baby last time she flew but they set themselves up with headphones and watched the hours away like seasoned travellers. There was hardly anyone on the first leg - to Singapore - so we could spread out and lie across seats for some sleep (we set off late evening).<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HqTLcX-cLH0/V0Z8y8MNVXI/AAAAAAAAAMA/sNh3ChEnBDE6q3fVUNpGSA1gRxzRbMszwCLcB/s1600/13151991_10154366309344893_1673397348112350284_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HqTLcX-cLH0/V0Z8y8MNVXI/AAAAAAAAAMA/sNh3ChEnBDE6q3fVUNpGSA1gRxzRbMszwCLcB/s200/13151991_10154366309344893_1673397348112350284_n.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
We found the recommended roof top pool for a freshen up at Chingi airport, but sadly the butterfly garden was in darkness by the time we got round to that just before boarding to Brisbane, our last stop before New Zealand. If you are going long haul, in my limited experience, Singapore airlines with a stopover in Singapore (even just for a couple of hours or so) is a pretty fine way to do it.<br />
<br />
Of course when flying from Brisbane to Wellington most of the journey is over the sea, but it was a beautiful morning and when we reached the dramatic coastline of the South Island we could tell why people love it so much.<br />
<br />
Going through the airport in Wellington went smoothly - visas checked and boots declared suitably mud-free. The passport official was the first to welcome us to New Zealand.<br />
<br />
The next to welcome us were Bruce's colleague with his teenage daughter who had both helped set up our rented house with some basics. With various items of furniture lent by other colleagues, some hospice shop kitchenware and groceries in the fridge and cupboard we could start to settle in straight away. We even had homemade cookies and cake, and tulips on the table. Thank you to the Wilsons and other university folks who helped make this happen.<br />
<br />
So that was us, arriving in Wellington and made to feel welcome. More about our first few days exploring in the next post...<br />
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-76982365766185850902016-05-10T08:19:00.000+01:002016-05-10T08:19:24.904+01:00Packing it inWell, this is it. This evening we fly to New Zealand via Singapore and Brisbane - too far for a direct flight of course. We arrive on Thursday afternoon local time.<br />
<br />
What a full few months it has been. I emptied my handbag as part of the packing last week. Pulling out tickets and receipts I found Fame tickets from when Pippa was in the Rare Productions performance in February, Bounce info for an early, early birthday trampolining outing for Susannah, and Act Out tickets from Susannah's drama performance in April. Bruce missed these, along with so many other events that happened before his return nearly two weeks ago. He was back just in time for the rather stunning ballet show, and then the packing up for the move. <br />
<br />
Since February, when he has been busy getting his feet under his desk (or perhaps it should be lab bench?) in Wellington, I've been navigating a hectic family pretty much as a single parent with Facetime as my prop. I am so grateful for the fantastic support from friends and neighbours who helped with practical and emotional needs - from occasional school pick ups to washing tent pegs to be packed in a shipping container to thoughtful discussions with the girls about how they are feeling about the exciting but daunting move ahead.<br />
<br />
We've had loads of jobs to get through to prepare the house for new tenants: including installing a new bathroom, boiler replacement, and work on the electrics. We also had to prepare for packing the house - the charity shops in Stony are well stocked, the younger cousins are benefiting from the latest set of hand downs, and the recycling bags have been filled with old university notes and as much paperwork as I have managed to sort out. Unfortunately, although huge progress was made there is lots to get on top of when it reaches us in Wellington, and it was disheartening to have to send so much junk to land fill - we acquire so much that ends up being of no use or pleasure to anyone.<br />
<br />
But while all of this has kept us busy (not to mention my trying to continue with actual work work), it has been the hidden job that has taken the most emotional energy. That is giving enough time to tend to the needs of the girls: wiping away tears, recognising when cuddles are needed, creating special moments to treasure, and trying not to get too snippy when we are all tired and have had enough. They missed Bruce enormously (having him back has been so lovely), they are sad about leaving friends, they don't want to say good bye. It's not been easy, but this has given us an opportunity to develop our relationships, to be reminded of what's important (people not possessions), and to keep a sense of being grounded while being uprooted.<br />
<br />
This is turning into a rather long blog post now, but for obvious reasons it has been a tad hectic of late!<br />
<br />
There are a couple of major episodes from recent weeks that we hadn't anticipated and I am happy to get to today and know that these did not become the straw that broke the camel's back. These both involved hospital visits and so now is a good opportunity to update friends on the latest health news: <br />
<br />
Firstly, Susannah's foot. The pain that resulted in a trip to A&E for an X-ray and a week or so on crutches has subsided somewhat and to everyone's relief and her own great enjoyment, she was able to take part in the ballet show. The follow up MRI scan showed a small patch of <span data-dobid="hdw">oedema (swelling) </span>in one joint in the ankle area and so the likely diagnosis is bone bruising. It is still bothering her occasionally, but helped by ibuprofen. If it continues, we'll be testing the New Zealand healthcare system to try and get to the bottom of it.<br />
<br />
Secondly, Dad's cracked bones and troublesome heart. He's recovering well in hospital. The fall from his bike was over a month ago and the ribs and shoulder are no longer giving him as much pain. I hesitate to give too much detail in this public space, but he has had an angiogram which thankfully showed no blockage, and he now awaits the fitting of an ICD (implantable cardioverter defibrillator - a bit like a pacemaker but designed to shock the heart back into a regular rhythm when it detects abnormalities). He is no longer requiring the strong drugs that made him very confused, and he is now able to walk around the ward unaided. He has been allowed his laptop as he was starting to get bored! It is good to be boarding the flight knowing that he should be home soon.<br />
<br />
The last week has passed in a bit of a blur. We had Pickfords in for three days packing all our belongings, and on the fourth day they loaded it all into a shipping container. It will be July before we see it again. And I don't need to hear your horror stories of containers being dropped in the ocean never to be seen again thank you very much. The house was cleaned professionally and looks great. Lucky tenant!<br />
<br />
We partied the weekend away with dear friends. <br />
<br />
Bruce has found us somewhere to live in Karori - a large suburb in Wellington - and it was lovely to get an email with a few more details about the house and neighbourhood, including learning there is a family next door with three kids who go to the same local school we hope Pippa and Susannah will go to. We've had so many goodbyes our hearts ache, but it is so exciting to look forward to the fantastic adventure ahead.<br />
<br />
Each day is bringing something new. The girls haven't even been on a plane before - what a long journey for their first. Personally, I can't wait to sit down, have my meals brought to me, and to get stuck into a good book!<br />
<br />
Here is are a few photos from recent events.<br />
<br />
Kia Ora!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zNn21VOdK18/VzGJatJNPKI/AAAAAAAAAK8/7oitw1YKypg88cKKERVeAo135wDr-PG1wCLcB/s1600/13094210_10154204986912372_645417595727639571_n%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zNn21VOdK18/VzGJatJNPKI/AAAAAAAAAK8/7oitw1YKypg88cKKERVeAo135wDr-PG1wCLcB/s320/13094210_10154204986912372_645417595727639571_n%25281%2529.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6n4FK5KyVxI/VzGJbBvorlI/AAAAAAAAALE/fFMVZSGnAxw34OPvcCwDodH2rFYy-A6dgCLcB/s1600/13001166_10154164493762372_5210940805079319169_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6n4FK5KyVxI/VzGJbBvorlI/AAAAAAAAALE/fFMVZSGnAxw34OPvcCwDodH2rFYy-A6dgCLcB/s320/13001166_10154164493762372_5210940805079319169_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-N55GFKh0lM4/VzGJbRdl3WI/AAAAAAAAALQ/t8LHsK8CuNM0f4g48yo74OUWpDPq91fIwCLcB/s1600/13177312_10154224107617372_7253371305652323163_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-N55GFKh0lM4/VzGJbRdl3WI/AAAAAAAAALQ/t8LHsK8CuNM0f4g48yo74OUWpDPq91fIwCLcB/s320/13177312_10154224107617372_7253371305652323163_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FHEowGR2MNQ/VzGJblqaBAI/AAAAAAAAALY/iRCnbMdiIo86viuYUIpjG2FY7ux3ny4nQCLcB/s1600/13220881_10154224107152372_1477706451269838630_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FHEowGR2MNQ/VzGJblqaBAI/AAAAAAAAALY/iRCnbMdiIo86viuYUIpjG2FY7ux3ny4nQCLcB/s320/13220881_10154224107152372_1477706451269838630_n.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-g6nKpBUWXvI/VzGJbFtIgDI/AAAAAAAAALM/QBhCOOT_YbMB7d7tnmFt2tU02A_V-TxfgCLcB/s1600/13173853_10154214809252372_2893472846174826257_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-g6nKpBUWXvI/VzGJbFtIgDI/AAAAAAAAALM/QBhCOOT_YbMB7d7tnmFt2tU02A_V-TxfgCLcB/s320/13173853_10154214809252372_2893472846174826257_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-n5loUY_ntj8/VzGJbMGpv_I/AAAAAAAAALI/8lvFWtRleBUKyr8xanWHV3Gqbf3c7RbOwCLcB/s1600/13173651_10154224107227372_7707351596696585353_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-n5loUY_ntj8/VzGJbMGpv_I/AAAAAAAAALI/8lvFWtRleBUKyr8xanWHV3Gqbf3c7RbOwCLcB/s320/13173651_10154224107227372_7707351596696585353_n.jpg" width="240" /></a><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-dzWZsTC5iTw/VzGJbfy8GZI/AAAAAAAAALU/iLJsbEhk9E8703z2x2i4bdFV6D3iTxEawCLcB/s1600/13178611_10154224107492372_8497731666000671268_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-dzWZsTC5iTw/VzGJbfy8GZI/AAAAAAAAALU/iLJsbEhk9E8703z2x2i4bdFV6D3iTxEawCLcB/s320/13178611_10154224107492372_8497731666000671268_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-71429442164331278142016-03-20T22:59:00.000+00:002016-03-20T23:16:12.329+00:00It's getting emotional...We are no longer on solid ground. With flights booked for 10 May, the big move is fast approaching. We are being uprooted and we're trying to cope with not knowing what our future looks like and feels like.<br />
<br />
We've had tears. "I don't know how I'm going to say goodbye" is Pippa's latest lament, said through barely controlled sobs. She looks forward to seeing her nearest and dearest before we go but feels overwhelmed by the emotion of the situation. Susannah chooses pulling funny faces over conversation during Facetime with Bruce, but at bedtime she finds more words: "I miss Daddy!" she cries, adding, perceptively, "And you need him too." She was also dismayed when I said she couldn't really apply for after school clubs next term because of leaving ("Why do we even have to go to New Zealand? It's affecting everything!")<br />
<br />
Since the turn of the year we have been facing farewells and last times of doing things before we head off to the other side of the world. <br />
<br />
The pace of these seems to be accelerating now. Pippa's had her last cello lesson. Today I returned the allotment key - alone (the girls said it was too sad to come with me).<br />
<br />
It's not all doom and gloom of course. We still have a giggle round the dinner table, and we are busy with our usual dancing, gymnastics, swimming, etc. We are looking forward to getting to New Zealand and exploring. Most of all we are looking forward to being with Bruce again.<br />
<br />
But it does feel like a lonely slog at times. There is still a lot to do to get ready for renting the house out and shipping our belongings. There is daily progress but I'm not entirely sure if the progress is quick enough. It will be like Christmas though - it will happen whether we are fully prepared or not.<br />
<br />
I am aware of trying, but not necessarily succeeding, in doing the best thing as a parent. Mostly I am going softer. I've pretty much given up on pushing Susannah with her times tables this week. She only has three weeks left in school - and with Good Friday and an Inset day - they are not even full weeks. Does it really matter if she doesn't know 7x8? I am doing my best to reassure about the changes - not dismissing them as trivial, but trying to listen and respond. It is not always easy though when the clingy-ness factor goes up, or I hear for the 100th time about a sore foot (it's the whine in the voice that irks the most). I keep administering cuddles.<br />
<br />
Like most of the population in the vicinity, I think we will all be helped along by a dose of sunshine and the warmth of Spring. Cold grey days are not what we need for lifting the spirits. Although early this year, we are in need of the Easter break already - relaxation with family and friends, fresh air and fun. Being somewhere other than home, because already we are all too aware that soon we will need to make our home somewhere completely new to us.<br />
<br />
Of course we are lucky. We have chosen to make this move. We have chosen to unsettle ourselves and to create a home somewhere else (in a beautiful place with a great reputation for family life no less). My heart goes out to everyone who has no choice but to move and little choice about where they go, sacrificing all because they are fleeing war or famine. We are migrants, they are refugees. The media sometimes muddles the too terms. But even for our chosen path it's emotional and will be for some time. <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yWG4Ei1GQes/Vu8n42xz46I/AAAAAAAAAJ4/4kOl9oR1zC0j-yA5zPaO4DkkeL1UyYjFQ/s1600/535303_10154076694997372_3585920319507430713_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yWG4Ei1GQes/Vu8n42xz46I/AAAAAAAAAJ4/4kOl9oR1zC0j-yA5zPaO4DkkeL1UyYjFQ/s320/535303_10154076694997372_3585920319507430713_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Final daffodils from the allotment. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-69671316825205801642016-02-06T09:17:00.001+00:002016-02-06T09:17:41.852+00:00Full steam aheadI had been intending to write a blog post about living with uncertainty. Now, however, it seems there is too much busy-ness to spend so long reflecting on the past year and the emotional coping strategies that entailed. Although we still face many unknowns, the direction is much clearer. The decision to commit to a new future has been made and the pieces of the jigsaw are being put into place.<br />
<br />
This time last year, Bruce visited colleagues in Wellington, New Zealand and learned more about the job he had applied for there. It was (and still is!) a job that had his name written all over it and he had been shortlisted although the interviews had yet to happen.<br />
The prospect of a move to NZ has taken a lot of getting used to though. The job is great, and there is no doubt that it is a beautiful country with so many benefits. But, oh my goodness, what a distance from family and friends. The UK is our home; could we really go so far away that the time and money required would make even an annual visit back a major undertaking?<br />
<br />
Even after the interview was successful and the job offer accepted, there have been periods of doubt:<br />
<ul>
<li>Would the department really invest in the type of equipment needed to build up the facility proposed? The answer to that was yes. The container containing the recently purchased mass spec is possibly going through the Suez Canal as I type. In other words, Bruce is taking one of his favourite pieces of lab instrumentation from one institution to the next, a major step in expanding the research capabilities of where he is going.</li>
<li>Would we get through the visa process? In the end I had to jump through a few extra hoops with my medical history. If the visas hadn't come through, what on earth would have been our plan b?</li>
<li>When would we tell the girls? When should we aim to move? </li>
</ul>
Since the turn of the year, though, the reality of the undertaking has become more apparent. Now there are no doubts about whether it is the right thing or not. We are going, and we are going to make the most of it. We are relishing the adventure and we are excited. <br />
<br />
We've achieved a huge amount in the past month or so.<br />
<br />
Five years' worth of DIY has been crammed into a few weeks, with fresh coats of paint, fixed door handles, replacing the shower cubicle... the list was long. Also, transplanting apple trees and other plants from the allotment (an emotional undertaking). One car has been sold. Those we all items on Bruce's list I might add - I am the taking bags of unwanted-but-still-functional clothing and clutter to the charity shop member of the team. Also contributing to the admin: getting three shipping companies to come round and quote for removals to NZ, three lettings agents for renting our house out once we've gone. Of course there has been non-NZ activity too: a tax return to do, feeding the family, trying to work.<br />
<br />
What next?<br />
<br />
Bruce flies out tomorrow.<br />
<br />
The adventure starts in earnest.<br />
<br />
We will continue to put everything we can into place while he's away. We have the bathroom refit in March, we need some more work to be done before we can let the house. At times it will be a struggle. The girls are not looking forward to seeing their dad go. Neither am I for that matter! More than two months apart is a long time and we'll miss him. He'll be homesick. Facetime and Skype will become our norm. We will enjoy our distractions - Bruce getting stuck into his new job, and for us girls: ballet, gymnastics, visits to friends and family, and preparations for the ballet show which lead right up until the end of our time here at the beginning of May.<br />
<br />
Time will drag when our hearts ache, but mostly time will go too quickly. We'll be off before we know it. It's full steam ahead!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-28911229138879866692016-01-03T20:15:00.001+00:002016-01-03T20:17:56.035+00:00New year, new adventure... New Zealand!This year we will embark on what could be the biggest adventure of our lives: we are moving to New Zealand. <br />
<br />
It is not an exact science, pinpointing precisely when this chapter of our lives started, because although I say 'about to embark', the move itself isn't really the beginning of the adventure. Even the very idea of upping sticks and going to the other side of the world is a step into something new. We feel British, our friends and family are here, and while we occasionally pine for sea and mountains, our feet are not terribly itchy. Mental preparation counts as part of the adventure too I would suggest.<br />
<br />
The prospect of New Zealand first came up more than five years ago. Job opportunities for a specialist, analytical research scientist are extremely limited in the UK in Bruce's subject. When Victoria University in Wellington started developing plans for their research facility and a new post was under discussion it was certainly worth a second look. Then I had my cancer diagnosis and the whole notion was filed as an impossibility.<br />
<br />
This time last year, it all became a very real option again. With only a year left on his contract at the OU, Bruce applied for the position that had eventually been created in the department at Vic - a role that is right up his street, a gem of a job. He went out to meet up with colleagues there, to have a good look, and although not interviewed at that time, he was left with a clear impression that should he be successful when the time came, Wellington would be a great place for us as a family, not just for him as a research scientist. <br />
<br />
So, on the face of it, that it is it. He was offered the job. He accepted. Great opportunity - let's go!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Po-iCdcgmM4/VomBHFYsKqI/AAAAAAAAAIc/4rx3QrMPA58/s1600/535361_10153879066627372_6733427031217994366_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Po-iCdcgmM4/VomBHFYsKqI/AAAAAAAAAIc/4rx3QrMPA58/s200/535361_10153879066627372_6733427031217994366_n.jpg" width="200" /></a>Of course there has been rather more soul searching and discussion about it than that. And the not insignificant step of applying for visas. <br />
<br />
I intend to blog again over the coming weeks with progress reports, so for now I think I will leave further background to events of last year for another time, and instead bring us up to date.<br />
<br />
The visas arrived just before Christmas, a few days before Bruce's contract at the OU ended. This meant that at last we can be more confident about making plans.<br />
<br />
However, we have not yet booked flights. It is summer holiday time in NZ so communication with members of the university has been limited since the visas came through. Bruce wants to start work as soon as possible, but we have so much to do here first getting the house ready to rent out. We are still discussing how it might work for Bruce to go out soon (to start work in Feb, and to find us somewhere to live there), while the girls and I continue here for a bit longer - P is in a performance towards the end of Feb, and we are hoping to have a bathroom refit in early March. <br />
<br />
As you can tell, there we have loads to organise and achieve, but at least we are now able to get on with it. This weekend's tasks included Bruce advertising the dome from the observatory (the telescope goes with us, the dome does not), and me clearing a mountain of random paperwork that has been growing and gathering dust since the kitchen extension was built more than seven years ago!<br />
<br />
The girls are very mixed up about it all - although excited about some aspects, they are very sad about leaving friends behind. More about that in a future post.<br />
<br />
Thank you to everyone who has been putting me in touch with their contacts in NZ. It is great to know there is a network of friends, and friends of friends out there. We look forward to getting to know people better when we arrive. Also, we will welcome tips about all sorts of things from removal firms to schools to the best beaches!<br />
<br />
<br />
I wish you well whatever adventures you encounter this year.<br />
<br />
Happy New Year everyone!<br />
<br />
xxx<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-58665386661209936932015-12-10T14:05:00.000+00:002015-12-10T14:05:08.137+00:00Defined by our actionsLike millions in the UK, and 223 of our MPs, I was against our country's involvement in air strikes in Syria.<br />
<br />
My MP was not one of those voting against the motion last week and we had an email exchange where I put forward my views and he gave a measured response. It was a standard letter explaining his stance to reply to the emails he was no doubt receiving lobbying against the bombing campaign, but a thought through, reasoned response none the less.<br />
<br />
This was a few days before the vote, and given Cameron's outrageous 'terrorist sympathiser' remarks, I felt the need to write a follow up email. I was joining the voices calling for peace, voices expressing anguish about the prospect of escalating the situation rather than resolving it. I knew he wouldn't change his mind, but I knew that saying nothing would mean I had done nothing to prevent it. <br />
<br />
It took a while for the second response to come through (after the vote of course, my second email was too close to the debate to expect a reply). Again it was a measured, thoughtful response. Except for one sentence about Deash which has really got my back up:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"They hate us and want to attack us for who we are, not what we do."</blockquote>
Really?!<br />
<br />
There is more than one reason why I take issue with this 'who we are, not what we do' sentence.<br />
<br />
Firstly, what the hell is that meant to mean: 'who we are?' And in what way is that unrelated to what we do?<br />
<br />
Who are we? - Human. I don't believe that we are hated simply for being human because then the organisation would surely implode through in-fighting. Who are we? British. But being British means being part of a diverse nation. Are we hated for our diversity? Are we hated for lack of faith, or too many faiths in close proximity? Are we hated for our role in the Western world? Well, I expect it is the latter possibility that comes closer to it. But then isn't our role inextricably linked with what we do. How can you possibly define who we are without examining our actions?<br />
<br />
Secondly, I resent the way this sentence creates an 'us' and 'them'. Everyone starts off being a son or daughter. Many, although presumably not all, will have been cherished and loved. But then their upbringing, experience, belief system, conflicts and influences have led them to act in ways that we struggle to comprehend. However, assuming that they hate us no matter what we do, means that there is no possibility of change, of reconciliation. I also resent being put in an 'us' category that I have no say over.<br />
<br />
Why might someone hate me as individual when they don't know me? Surely it is because of what is being done in my name (however much I may hashtag <s>#</s>notinmyname). It must be the action, not the very fact of being that is the problem. Would they really hate 'us' as much if it were not for our actions - either present or historic - in creating inequalities in the world, taking greater than our share of the world's resources, treating people with mistrust while at the same time being perfectly happy to sell them weapons? <br />
<br />
Therefore, I still feel very strongly that dropping bombs wrong thing to do. On an individual level, I do not want to sanction the killing of another individual. Whether air strikes can be limited to infrastructure or not (and I very much doubt that they can be), I believe bombing in the area will directly or indirectly kill people. The Syrians home land is already such a terrifying place they are forced to flee and try their luck in desperate circumstances, in over crowded refugee camps or attempting to cross borders which we also seem to be determined to secure against them. We only make it worse with our actions. We will create more fear, which in turn could lead to more hate. For those already involved in terrorism, they will feel more justified in their actions against us.<br />
<br />
What do our actions say about who we are? If we bomb, it says we are aggressive. If we aim for dialogue, it says we want to create a human connection. If we sell arms to people or nations without taking into consideration their human rights record, it says we care more about money than peace. If we invest in the health and education of our people, it says we value each other.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
So what can we do? Not bombing does not mean not taking any action at all. Indeed we need to keep living, keep loving, and keep on striving to live in harmony with our fellow human beings. We need to make sure we make informed choices in our daily lives, and exert what influence we can to seek peace. We need to make sure that what we do is in keeping with who we are, recognising that what we will be known for what we do.<br />
<br />
There is a small sentence within the Quaker Advices and Queries that is currently stuck in my mind:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Let your life speak."</blockquote>
We should let our lives speak and allow what we choose to do to be a true expression of who we are. <br />
<br />
It is easy to feel overwhelmed by the situation, but I take heart that I am far from alone in my belief that bombing is not the way to resolve conflict. I
thank everyone who has expressed concern about the road we are being
taken down, for there is strength to be gained from each other. I have
been grateful for people highlighting protests not always covered by the
mainstream media. I will remember the words of one of the Veterans for
Peace who returned his medal saying "you cannot sow bloodshed and reap
peace".<br />
<br />
We need to keep making our voices heard and listening to each other. You can be clear that the current bombing campaign in Syria is certainly not in my name. If it makes no difference today, then maybe it will tomorrow. And if not tomorrow, then perhaps greater understanding over time will help build the foundations to build a peaceful world. I choose hope over despair.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TQk0ay2blH4/VmmE7UdFXrI/AAAAAAAAAIA/3UFDWkFU4FE/s1600/12313645_10153821199767372_7268057514543229533_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="121" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TQk0ay2blH4/VmmE7UdFXrI/AAAAAAAAAIA/3UFDWkFU4FE/s320/12313645_10153821199767372_7268057514543229533_n.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-86139282118485033532015-06-13T14:49:00.000+01:002015-06-14T22:14:29.495+01:00Haves and have notsThe pressure is building. Apparently "most girls in my class have a phone", "everyone's on Instagram", "it's going to be even worse in year 6 when <i>everyone</i> has a phone except me".<br />
<br />
Our answer has been pretty consistent: "not until secondary school" and then, thinking about social media in particular, "those sites are meant to be for 13 plus".<br />
<br />
I find it hard to believe that everyone <i>does </i>have a phone at age ten (and actually these conversations started best part of a year ago). But, an unscientific straw poll of mums makes it clear that it is surprisingly common in this particular year 5 group, although less so in a nearby school in Wolverton. However, having a phone, ipod or tablet doesn't automatically mean access to social networking. Incidentally, for those that do have an Instagram account, I'm not sure if they have had to lie about their age when setting the account up and whether this has been endorsed by their parents or not. <br />
<br />
I suspect that there are some children keeping very quiet when phones and social media are discussed. These kids probably face the harsh reality of parents struggling to get food on the table every day or to replace outgrown shoes, never mind having a spare phone to hand down. They have to make do with what they have in so many ways, a phone is one part of a much bigger aspirational dream not a sole item to focus on. Possibly. I haven't spoken to them to know how it feels, so perhaps a phone or access to Instagram is a massive deal to them too. <br />
<br />
But, what I do know is that if you are being told by your peers that you have to get on Instagram to join in the class gossip, then you end up with a longing to be part of the crowd. It is yet one more situation where there is a divide between the haves and the have nots.<br />
<br />
As a parent this puts you in a tough place.<br />
<br />
Many of the kids on Instagram think they are protecting themselves by having private accounts, and certainly this cuts down some of the risks they are exposed to. However, there is no protection from what I see as problems with social media for adults, let alone inexperienced pre-teens.<br />
<br />
For example, everyone is having a fantastic time at a party. Except you. You had been feeling a little flat about not having an invitation, but seeing who was there, including people you didn't even really think the host was friends with, and then fun photos they took, feeling a little flat turns into feeling absolutely gutted. Not a biggie? An emotional roller coaster for a sensitive child.<br />
<br />
There are many other reasons why social media should be treated with caution: comparing how many followers you have with someone else; how much you expose yourself to negativity of the very worst kind (sickening comments lacking in any ounce of humanity from people hiding behind anonymity); exposure to sexualised content; addiction to being constantly stimulated and connected, forgetting to appreciate what else life has to offer. <br />
<br />
Of course there are wonderful things about social media too: creativity, humour, connecting with friends across a distance, finding people with common interests. You prevent access to all of that while you act in what you believe are the best interests of your child, because the dark side of social media is dark indeed. At the same time you know you are creating a different problem: preventing them from being in the 'in' crowd, turning them into a 'have not'. I do get that, I really do.<br />
<br />
On the positive side, we've had lots of discussion about it and our parent-child relationship continues to develop as there is awareness of problems with either approach. While we are a 'have not' family when it comes to children with phones (and things like TVs in bedrooms), we are a 'have' family when it comes to books, dancing, pens and paper, and after school activities, not to mention cuddles and love.<br />
<br />
For when push comes to shove, surely a loving home environment is the most important thing to provide for everyone in your household? <br />
<br />
Whether your child is networked or not, I'm sure you will continue to want the best for them. We need to keep setting examples of the behaviour we hope them to follow. We need to make sure we are not constantly on devices ourselves, and above all teach them kindness and sensitivity to deal with difference - whether that is being denied access to social media by an interfering parent, responding to someone who isn't allowed the same freedoms, or being a have or have not in some other sphere of life.<br />
<br />
The irony is that if you are reading this, you probably chanced upon a link I posted on Facebook or Twitter! I can now assure you that I am now about to go out with my daughter for some real life experience - probably getting wet as we walk into town, buying some new jazz shoes for her, a newspaper for me, and talking to each other. We may laugh, we may bicker, but we'll rub along together without needing to share pictures of it with the world. <br />
<br />
A final word for any parents who haven't had to give social media much thought yet, there is an excellent review of some networking sites you may be personally unfamiliar with produced by the NSPCC: <a href="http://www.nspcc.org.uk/ShareAware">http://www.nspcc.org.uk/ShareAware</a><br />
<br />Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638577034200459781.post-66996059766373960832015-05-09T08:31:00.000+01:002015-06-14T22:15:41.920+01:00Don't despair, do something<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
What a depressing night. I stayed up long enough to sense that the exit polls were right, but it was only in the morning that the full horror was apparent.<br />
<br />
It would appear that the <strike>British </strike> English electorate fear economic instability more than they fear the dismantling of the welfare state and the ruining of individual lives. They've put corporate before people.<br />
<br />
How could they?<br />
<br />
<br />
I feel a bit sick when I think about how much worse things could get now that the Tories are in with the kind of endorsement they've had in this election. It seems to me, that those of us who are strongly opposed to the cuts, the devastation of lives, and the threat to the environment by our current practices are going to have to work harder than ever.<br />
<br />
I have not so far lived the life of an activist. My first peace protest was earlier this year. I sign on-line petitions, and I've been an active fundraiser for charity, but until relatively recently I've been fairly benign in a political sense. Anyway, family life keeps me busy enough...<br />
<br />
Well, yesterday after seeing what had happened I was convinced that more and more people are going to need to be engaged in stitching together the holes in the safety net for society's most vulnerable. Food banks - which should be unnecessary in a country as wealthy as ours - are going to be relied upon more than ever. Charity will have to provide where the government fails to.<br />
<br />
So, yesterday I became a woman on a mission. I decided that I would take my first action to make a difference. A small action, but a symbolic one.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1yTZ1MtfkrU/VU2zbRl-z3I/AAAAAAAAAEU/J-s1GDPaIDo/s1600/10464102_10153308954532372_3361565644010356701_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1yTZ1MtfkrU/VU2zbRl-z3I/AAAAAAAAAEU/J-s1GDPaIDo/s200/10464102_10153308954532372_3361565644010356701_n.jpg" width="200" /></a>I went to the local supermarket and shopped for the food bank. As I'd decided to cycle the goods over to our local food bank (at a guess 3 miles away), I didn't want to overload the basket with heavy items, but I bought everything highlighted in red on their proposed shopping list which for Milton Keynes can be found on-line <a href="http://mkfoodbank.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Shopping-List_Low-Items_2014.pdf" target="_blank">here</a>.<br />
<br />
I hadn't reckoned on having to change a bike tyre along the way, but this made my determination even greater - frustration and disappointment turned into focus and action.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jD9EkpvOqug/VU2zbvsSrVI/AAAAAAAAAEY/KSg2zobz9Ig/s1600/11207336_10153308954787372_3344834748377888412_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jD9EkpvOqug/VU2zbvsSrVI/AAAAAAAAAEY/KSg2zobz9Ig/s200/11207336_10153308954787372_3344834748377888412_n.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
I was happy that this also became a sociable activity as Hannah joined me for the bike ride and also brought some items raided from her cupboard at home. <br />
<br />
And you know what? I felt so much better about having done something with my morning: doing something that will help someone in need, getting out on the bike, meeting up with a friend and having a sense of purpose.<br />
<br />
So, my friends, please don't forget that the re-election of a Tory government is not the end, but a continuation. We need to find something, anything, to counteract the negativity, to protect what we believe in and to make a positive difference. I hope this doesn't sound trite or preachy, but I think even small actions can make a difference. Even something as simple as a smile.<br />
<br />
So, let's not despair, let's do something. Let's get out there and smile again. x<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Aa2lfNTggi8/VU2zb3t7zrI/AAAAAAAAAEc/KeqCZikky_o/s1600/11070626_10153308954852372_4081890335600990237_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Aa2lfNTggi8/VU2zb3t7zrI/AAAAAAAAAEc/KeqCZikky_o/s320/11070626_10153308954852372_4081890335600990237_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zZXe5Y0m5vI/VU2zcYLakFI/AAAAAAAAAEk/nh_PrCPatEQ/s1600/11258199_10153308954947372_4934981978513329196_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zZXe5Y0m5vI/VU2zcYLakFI/AAAAAAAAAEk/nh_PrCPatEQ/s320/11258199_10153308954947372_4934981978513329196_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Eleanor Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03504348134512195998noreply@blogger.com0